所在位置:经典英文对白 > 经典英文台词 > 奇爱博士

奇爱博士

1
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<i>For more than a year, ominous rumors</i>
<i>had been privately circulating...</i>

2
00:00:46,312 --> 00:00:48,542
<i>... among high-level</i>
<i>Western leaders...</i>

3
00:00:48,748 --> 00:00:52,582
<i>... that the Soviet Union had been at</i>
<i>work on what was darkly hinted to be...</i>

4
00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:56,313
<i>... the ultimate weapon:</i>
<i>A doomsday device.</i>

5
00:00:56,523 --> 00:01:00,289
<i>Intelligence sources traced the site</i>
<i>of the top-secret Russian project...</i>

6
00:01:00,493 --> 00:01:03,053
<i>... to the perpetually fog-shrouded</i>
<i>wasteland...</i>

7
00:01:03,263 --> 00:01:06,528
<i>... below the Arctic peaks</i>
<i>of the Zhokhov Islands.</i>

8
00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:08,030
<i>What they were building...</i>

9
00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:11,931
<i>... or why it should be located in such</i>
<i>a remote and desolate place...</i>

10
00:01:12,138 --> 00:01:14,333
<i>... no one could say.</i>

11
00:03:44,657 --> 00:03:48,024
- General Ripper, sir.
- Group Captain Mandrake speaking.

12
00:03:48,494 --> 00:03:51,190
- This is General Ripper speaking.
<i>- Yes, sir.</i>

13
00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:55,094
- Do you recognize my voice?
- I do, sir. Why do you ask?

14
00:03:55,301 --> 00:03:56,928
Why do you think I ask?

15
00:03:57,136 --> 00:04:00,594
Well, I don't know, sir. We spoke
just a few moments ago, didn't we?

16
00:04:00,807 --> 00:04:05,904
You don't think I'd ask unless it was
pretty damned important, do you?

17
00:04:06,112 --> 00:04:09,741
- No, I don't, sir, no.
<i>- Let's see if we can stay on the ball.</i>

18
00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:13,213
Has the wing confirmed holding
at their fail-safe points?

19
00:04:13,419 --> 00:04:16,115
Yes, sir. The confirmations
have all just come in.

20
00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:19,655
Very well.
Now, listen to me carefully.

21
00:04:19,859 --> 00:04:22,350
The base is being
put on condition red.

22
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:25,030
I want this flashed
to all sections immediately.

23
00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:28,395
Condition red. Jolly good idea.
Keeps the men on their toes.

24
00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:30,694
I'm afraid this is not an exercise.

25
00:04:32,071 --> 00:04:33,663
Not an exercise, sir?

26
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:39,908
I shouldn't tell you this, but you're a
good officer and have a right to know.

27
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,013
It looks like we're in a shooting war.

28
00:04:42,882 --> 00:04:44,816
Oh, hell.

29
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:47,987
- Are the Russians involved?
<i>- That's all I've been told.</i>

30
00:04:48,187 --> 00:04:52,886
It came in on the red phone. I'm gonna
follow orders and seal this base tight.

31
00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:57,459
Now, I want you to transmit Plan R...

32
00:04:57,664 --> 00:04:59,461
...R for Robert, to the wing.

33
00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:02,931
<i>- Plan R for Robert.</i>
- Is it that bad, sir?

34
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:05,502
- Looks like it's pretty hairy.
<i>- Yes, sir.</i>

35
00:05:05,705 --> 00:05:07,605
Plan R for Robert, sir.

36
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:11,004
Now, last, and possibly
most important...

37
00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:15,078
...I want all privately-owned radios
to be immediately impounded.

38
00:05:15,281 --> 00:05:18,910
They might be used to issue
instructions to saboteurs.

39
00:05:19,118 --> 00:05:22,485
As I previously arranged, Air Police
will have lists of all owners.

40
00:05:22,689 --> 00:05:26,318
I want every single one of them
collected without exception.

41
00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:28,756
After you've done that,
report back to me.

42
00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:58,482
<i>In order to guard against</i>
<i>surprise nuclear attack...</i>

43
00:05:58,691 --> 00:06:00,556
<i>... America's Strategic Air Command...</i>

44
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:03,490
<i>... maintains a large force</i>
<i>of B-52 bombers...</i>

45
00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:06,164
<i>... airborne 24 hours a day.</i>

46
00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:11,162
<i>Each B-52 can deliver a nuclear</i>
<i>bomb load of 50 megatons...</i>

47
00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:16,768
<i>... equal to 16 times the total explosive</i>
<i>force of all the bombs and shells...</i>

48
00:06:16,976 --> 00:06:20,742
<i>... used by all the armies</i>
<i>in World War II.</i>

49
00:06:20,947 --> 00:06:23,472
<i>Based in America,</i>
<i>the Airborne Alert Force...</i>

50
00:06:23,683 --> 00:06:26,618
<i>... is deployed from the Persian Gulf</i>
<i>to the Arctic Ocean.</i>

51
00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:29,811
<i>But they have one geographical factor</i>
<i>in common:</i>

52
00:06:30,022 --> 00:06:33,924
<i>They are all two hours</i>
<i>from their targets inside Russia.</i>

53
00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:56,707
Major Kong, I know you'll think
this is crazy...

54
00:07:56,909 --> 00:08:00,504
...but I just got a message from base
over the CRM 114.

55
00:08:01,614 --> 00:08:05,550
It decodes as wing attack Plan R.
R for Romeo.

56
00:08:08,688 --> 00:08:12,852
Goldie, did you say
wing attack Plan R?

57
00:08:13,259 --> 00:08:14,624
Yes, sir, I have.

58
00:08:18,364 --> 00:08:21,458
Goldie, how many times have
I told you guys...

59
00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:24,602
...that I don't want
no horsing around on the airplane?

60
00:08:24,804 --> 00:08:27,466
I'm not horsing around, sir,
that's how it decodes.

61
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:30,642
Well, I've been to one world fair,
a picnic and a rodeo...

62
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:34,142
<i>... and that's the stupidest thing</i>
<i>I ever heard over earphones.</i>

63
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,110
You sure you got today's code?

64
00:08:37,650 --> 00:08:38,639
Yes, sir, it is.

65
00:08:38,851 --> 00:08:41,319
There's just gotta be
something wrong.

66
00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:43,785
Wait a second, I'm coming back.

67
00:09:18,124 --> 00:09:21,616
Maybe you'd better get
a confirmation from base.

68
00:09:21,827 --> 00:09:23,419
Yes, sir.

69
00:09:44,350 --> 00:09:47,786
Major Kong, is it possible
this is some kind of loyalty test?

70
00:09:47,987 --> 00:09:51,286
Give the go code and then recall
to see who would actually go?

71
00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:55,017
Ain't nobody ever got
the go code yet.

72
00:09:55,227 --> 00:09:57,320
Old Ripper wouldn't be giving us
Plan R...

73
00:09:57,530 --> 00:10:00,124
...unless them Russkies had
clobbered Washington...

74
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:02,699
...and a lot of other towns
with a sneak attack.

75
00:10:02,902 --> 00:10:03,891
Yes, sir.

76
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,571
Major Kong, message
from base confirmed.

77
00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:14,269
Well, boys, I reckon this is it.

78
00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:18,343
Nuclear combat toe-to-toe
with the Russkies.

79
00:10:33,232 --> 00:10:38,067
Now, look, boys, I ain't much
of a hand at making speeches.

80
00:10:39,171 --> 00:10:42,698
But I got a pretty fair idea
that something doggone important...

81
00:10:42,908 --> 00:10:44,466
...is going on back there.

82
00:10:44,677 --> 00:10:49,307
Now, I've got a fair idea of the kind
of personal emotions...

83
00:10:49,515 --> 00:10:52,006
<i>... that some of you fellows</i>
<i>may be thinking.</i>

84
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:55,085
<i>Heck, I reckon you wouldn't even be</i>
<i>human beings...</i>

85
00:10:55,388 --> 00:10:59,757
<i>... if you didn't have strong personal</i>
<i>feelings about nuclear combat.</i>

86
00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:02,420
<i>But I want you to remember</i>
<i>one thing:</i>

87
00:11:02,628 --> 00:11:05,256
<i>That folks back home</i>
<i>is counting on you...</i>

88
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:07,932
<i>... and by golly,</i>
<i>we ain't about to let them down.</i>

89
00:11:09,101 --> 00:11:11,399
Tell you something else.

90
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:16,900
If this thing turns out to be half as
important as I figure it just might be...

91
00:11:17,109 --> 00:11:21,512
...l'd say that you're all in line
for some important promotions...

92
00:11:21,714 --> 00:11:24,774
...and personal citations
when this thing's over with.

93
00:11:24,984 --> 00:11:27,851
And that goes for
every last one of you...

94
00:11:28,054 --> 00:11:31,615
...regardless of your race,
color or your creed.

95
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:35,487
Now, let's get this thing on the hump.
We got some flying to do.

96
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:51,302
Buck, should I get it?

97
00:11:51,510 --> 00:11:53,375
Yeah, you have to.

98
00:11:59,185 --> 00:12:00,846
Hello?

99
00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:05,513
Yes, General Turgidson is here, but he
can't come to the phone at the moment.

100
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,920
Well, this is his secretary,
Miss Scott.

101
00:12:09,095 --> 00:12:11,188
Freddie, how are you?

102
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,524
Fine, and you?

103
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:17,794
Oh, we were just catching up
on some of the general's paperwork.

104
00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:21,065
Well, look, Freddie, he's tied up
at the moment.

105
00:12:21,273 --> 00:12:24,071
I'm afraid he can't come to the phone.

106
00:12:24,276 --> 00:12:25,470
Just a minute.

107
00:12:25,678 --> 00:12:28,806
General Turgidson,
a Colonel Puntrich calling.

108
00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:30,811
Tell him to call back.

109
00:12:31,016 --> 00:12:35,578
Freddie, the general says could you
call back in a minute or two?

110
00:12:35,788 --> 00:12:37,585
He says it can't wait.

111
00:12:37,790 --> 00:12:40,987
For Pete's... Find out what he wants.

112
00:12:41,193 --> 00:12:44,959
Freddie, the thing is, the general
is in the powder room right now.

113
00:12:45,164 --> 00:12:47,359
Could you tell me what it's about?

114
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:49,634
Just a second.

115
00:12:49,835 --> 00:12:52,861
Apparently they monitored
a transmission eight minutes ago...

116
00:12:53,072 --> 00:12:55,973
...from Burpelson Air Force Base.

117
00:12:57,343 --> 00:13:02,371
Right. It was directed to the
843rd bomb wing on airborne alert.

118
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:07,550
It decoded as wing attack Plan R.

119
00:13:07,753 --> 00:13:13,191
Well, tell him to call what's-his-name,
the base commander. Ripper.

120
00:13:13,392 --> 00:13:15,019
Do I have to think of everything?

121
00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:19,687
The general suggests you call General
Ripper, the 843rd base commander.

122
00:13:20,866 --> 00:13:23,164
All communications are dead.

123
00:13:23,369 --> 00:13:26,634
Bull! Tell him to do it himself.

124
00:13:26,839 --> 00:13:31,208
Freddie, the general asks if
you could possibly try again yourself.

125
00:13:31,844 --> 00:13:36,372
I see. He says he's tried personally
several times, but everything is dead.

126
00:13:36,582 --> 00:13:39,915
Even the normal phone lines
are shut down.

127
00:13:46,592 --> 00:13:49,390
Fred? Buck. What's it look like?

128
00:13:51,030 --> 00:13:52,429
Yeah?

129
00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:56,868
Well, are you sure it's Plan R?

130
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:03,668
What's cooking on the threat board?
Nothing? Nothing at all?

131
00:14:05,878 --> 00:14:08,369
I don't like the look of this, Fred.

132
00:14:09,415 --> 00:14:11,815
Tell you what you better do,
old buddy.

133
00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:15,350
Give Elmo and Charlie a blast.
Bump everything up to condition red.

134
00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:17,818
Stand by the blower.
I'll get back to you.

135
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:20,150
- What's up?
- Nothing, nothing.

136
00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:24,957
- Where's my shorts?
- On the floor. Where are you going?

137
00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:26,791
No place.

138
00:14:26,999 --> 00:14:31,595
I thought I might mosey over to the
war room, see what's doing over there.

139
00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:33,465
It's 3:00 in the morning.

140
00:14:33,672 --> 00:14:35,469
The Air Force never sleeps.

141
00:14:35,674 --> 00:14:39,542
Buck, honey, I'm not sleepy either.

142
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:44,944
I know how it is, baby.

143
00:14:45,150 --> 00:14:47,118
Tell you what you do.

144
00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:52,055
You just start your countdown
and old Bucky will be back here...

145
00:14:52,258 --> 00:14:55,750
...before you can say, "Blastoff!"

146
00:14:57,062 --> 00:15:02,090
<i>Your Commie has no regard</i>
<i>for human life, not even his own.</i>

147
00:15:02,301 --> 00:15:05,202
<i>And for this reason, men,</i>
<i>I want to impress upon you...</i>

148
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:08,134
<i>... the need</i>
<i>for extreme watchfulness.</i>

149
00:15:08,340 --> 00:15:12,333
The enemy may come individually
or he may come in strength.

150
00:15:12,544 --> 00:15:15,206
He may even come in the uniform
of our own troops.

151
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,572
<i>But however he comes,</i>
<i>we must stop him.</i>

152
00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:22,481
<i>We must not allow him</i>
<i>to gain entrance to this base.</i>

153
00:15:23,055 --> 00:15:26,889
<i>Now, I am going to give you</i>
<i>three simple rules.</i>

154
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:31,461
<i>First: Trust no one,</i>
<i>whatever his uniform or rank...</i>

155
00:15:31,664 --> 00:15:34,030
<i>... unless he is known</i>
<i>to you personally.</i>

156
00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:36,963
Second: Anyone or anything...

157
00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:41,936
...that approaches within 200 yards
of the perimeter is to be fired upon.

158
00:15:42,141 --> 00:15:47,636
<i>Third: If in doubt, shoot first</i>
<i>and ask questions afterwards.</i>

159
00:15:47,846 --> 00:15:51,077
<i>I would sooner accept</i>
<i>a few casualties through accident...</i>

160
00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:55,276
<i>... than lose the entire base and</i>
<i>its personnel through carelessness.</i>

161
00:15:55,487 --> 00:16:00,015
<i>Any variation on these rules</i>
<i>must come from me personally.</i>

162
00:16:00,659 --> 00:16:03,389
<i>Now, men, in conclusion...</i>

163
00:16:03,595 --> 00:16:07,531
<i>... I would like to say</i>
<i>that in the two years...</i>

164
00:16:07,733 --> 00:16:11,396
<i>... it has been my privilege</i>
<i>to be your commanding officer...</i>

165
00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:14,401
<i>... I have always expected</i>
<i>the best from you...</i>

166
00:16:14,606 --> 00:16:18,372
<i>... and you have never given me</i>
<i>anything less than that.</i>

167
00:16:18,577 --> 00:16:22,638
<i>Today the nation is counting on us.</i>

168
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:25,712
<i>We are not going to let them down.</i>

169
00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:27,909
<i>Good luck to you all.</i>

170
00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:01,110
Here's the attack profile, sir.

171
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,947
This is your attack profile.

172
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:34,278
"To ensure that the enemy cannot
monitor voice transmission...

173
00:17:34,486 --> 00:17:36,477
...or plant false transmission...

174
00:17:36,688 --> 00:17:41,682
...the CRM 114 is to be switched
into all receiver circuits.

175
00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:45,227
The emergency base code prefix
is to be set...

176
00:17:45,431 --> 00:17:47,695
<i>... on the dials of the CRM.</i>

177
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:52,337
<i>This will block any transmission other</i>
<i>than those preceded by a code prefix.</i>

178
00:17:54,006 --> 00:17:56,065
Stand by to set code prefix.

179
00:17:56,275 --> 00:17:58,607
Roger. Ready to set code prefix.

180
00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:01,211
Set code prefix.

181
00:18:10,322 --> 00:18:13,314
- Code prefix set.
- Lock code prefix.

182
00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,359
Code prefix locked.

183
00:18:17,563 --> 00:18:20,999
Switch all receiver circuits
to CRM discriminators.

184
00:18:22,601 --> 00:18:25,365
All circuits switched
to CRM discriminators.

185
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:28,096
<i>Check auto-destruct circuits.</i>

186
00:18:30,709 --> 00:18:32,609
Auto-destruct circuits checked.

187
00:18:38,050 --> 00:18:42,350
Primary target:
The ICBM complex at Laputa.

188
00:18:42,554 --> 00:18:48,789
Target reference:
Yankee-Golf-Tango, 360.

189
00:18:48,994 --> 00:18:54,955
Thirty-megaton nuclear device
fused for airburst at 10,000 feet.

190
00:18:55,167 --> 00:18:59,536
<i>Twenty-megaton nuclear device</i>
<i>will be used if first malfunctions.</i>

191
00:18:59,738 --> 00:19:02,263
<i>Otherwise, proceed</i>
<i>to secondary target:</i>

192
00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:06,376
<i>Missile complex seven miles east</i>
<i>of Borchov.</i>

193
00:19:06,578 --> 00:19:10,412
<i>Target reference:</i>
<i>November-Bravo-X-ray...</i>

194
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:12,948
...108.

195
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:18,385
Fused airburst at 10...
Check, 12,000 feet.

196
00:19:29,735 --> 00:19:33,535
Excuse me, sir. Something rather
interesting has just cropped up.

197
00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:36,503
Listen to that. Music.
Civilian broadcasting.

198
00:19:37,976 --> 00:19:42,310
I think the Pentagon has given us
an exercise to test our readiness.

199
00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:44,277
I think it's taking things too far.

200
00:19:44,483 --> 00:19:47,646
Our fellows will be inside Russian
radar cover in 20 minutes.

201
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:51,311
Listen to that. Chock-a-block
full of stations, all churning it out.

202
00:19:52,658 --> 00:19:54,319
- Mandrake?
- Yes, sir?

203
00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:57,654
I thought I issued instructions
for all radios to be impounded.

204
00:19:57,863 --> 00:20:02,027
You did, and I was in the process of
impounding this when I switched it on.

205
00:20:02,234 --> 00:20:05,829
I thought, our fellows hitting Russian
radar, dropping all their stuff...

206
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:10,304
...l'd better tell you. Because if
they do, it'll cause a bit of a stink.

207
00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:14,445
Group captain,
the officer-exchange program...

208
00:20:14,646 --> 00:20:18,138
...does not give you any special
prerogatives to question my orders.

209
00:20:18,350 --> 00:20:22,446
I realize that, sir, but I thought you'd
be rather pleased to hear the news.

210
00:20:22,654 --> 00:20:25,282
I mean, after all...
Well, let's face it.

211
00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:29,426
We don't want to start a nuclear war
unless we really have to, do we?

212
00:20:30,429 --> 00:20:33,990
Please sit down.
And turn that thing off.

213
00:20:34,199 --> 00:20:35,188
Yes, sir.

214
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:40,167
What about the planes? Surely we
must issue the recall code immediately.

215
00:20:40,372 --> 00:20:43,102
Group captain, the planes
are not gonna be recalled.

216
00:20:43,308 --> 00:20:46,766
My attack orders have been issued
and the orders stand.

217
00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:52,241
If you'll excuse me saying so, sir,
that would be, to my way of thinking...

218
00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:54,476
...rather an odd way of looking at it.

219
00:20:54,686 --> 00:20:56,950
If a Russian attack was in progress...

220
00:20:57,155 --> 00:21:00,955
...we would certainly not be hearing
civilian broadcasting.

221
00:21:01,159 --> 00:21:03,889
- Are you certain of that?
- I'm absolutely positive.

222
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,291
And what if it is true?

223
00:21:06,898 --> 00:21:09,867
I'm afraid I'm still not with you, sir,
because, I mean...

224
00:21:11,470 --> 00:21:13,734
If a Russian attack
was not in progress...

225
00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:19,036
...then your use of Plan R... In fact,
your orders to the entire wing...

226
00:21:25,751 --> 00:21:30,984
I would say that there was something
dreadfully wrong somewhere.

227
00:21:32,090 --> 00:21:34,354
Why don't you take it easy,
group captain.

228
00:21:34,559 --> 00:21:37,323
Please make me a drink
of grain alcohol and rainwater...

229
00:21:37,529 --> 00:21:39,997
...and help yourself
to whatever you'd like.

230
00:21:48,740 --> 00:21:52,733
General Ripper, sir, as an officer
in Her Majesty's Air Force...

231
00:21:52,944 --> 00:21:56,072
...it is my clear duty
under the present circumstances...

232
00:21:56,281 --> 00:22:00,843
...to issue the recall code upon my
own authority and bring back the wing.

233
00:22:01,053 --> 00:22:02,987
If you'll excuse me, sir.

234
00:22:11,630 --> 00:22:16,431
Sir, I must ask you for the key and the
recall code. Have you got them handy?

235
00:22:16,635 --> 00:22:19,001
I told you to take it easy,
group captain.

236
00:22:19,204 --> 00:22:21,672
There's nothing anybody can do
about this now.

237
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:24,138
I'm the only person who knows
the code group.

238
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:27,403
Then I must insist, sir,
that you give them to me!

239
00:22:35,954 --> 00:22:39,913
Do I take it, sir, you are threatening
a brother officer with a gun?

240
00:22:41,226 --> 00:22:46,254
Mandrake, I suppose
it never occurred to you...

241
00:22:46,465 --> 00:22:49,923
...that while we're chatting here
so enjoyably...

242
00:22:50,135 --> 00:22:53,866
...a decision is being made
by the president...

243
00:22:54,072 --> 00:22:57,166
...and the joint chiefs in the war room
at the Pentagon.

244
00:22:58,276 --> 00:23:03,771
And when they realize there is
no possibility of recalling the wing...

245
00:23:03,982 --> 00:23:07,281
...there will be only one course
of action open:

246
00:23:08,186 --> 00:23:10,177
Total commitment.

247
00:23:12,491 --> 00:23:17,895
Mandrake, do you recall what
Clemenceau once said about war?

248
00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:20,892
No, I don't think I do, sir. No.

249
00:23:22,601 --> 00:23:25,593
He said war was too important
to be left to the generals.

250
00:23:26,705 --> 00:23:30,573
When he said that, 50 years ago...

251
00:23:30,776 --> 00:23:33,244
...he might have been right.

252
00:23:33,445 --> 00:23:35,675
But today...

253
00:23:35,881 --> 00:23:39,214
...war is too important
to be left to politicians.

254
00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:43,752
They have neither the time,
the training...

255
00:23:43,955 --> 00:23:46,947
...nor the inclination
for strategic thought.

256
00:23:50,629 --> 00:23:54,030
I can no longer sit back
and allow...

257
00:23:54,232 --> 00:23:59,260
...Communist infiltration,
Communist indoctrination...

258
00:23:59,471 --> 00:24:01,837
...Communist subversion...

259
00:24:02,541 --> 00:24:06,307
...and the international
Communist conspiracy...

260
00:24:06,511 --> 00:24:09,241
...to sap and impurify...

261
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:12,713
...all of our precious bodily fluids.

262
00:24:18,924 --> 00:24:20,255
Staines, is everybody here?

263
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:23,019
Mr. President, the secretary of state
is in Vietnam.

264
00:24:23,228 --> 00:24:26,994
The secretary of defense is in Laos,
the vice president is in Mexico City.

265
00:24:27,199 --> 00:24:30,032
We can establish contact with them
at any time.

266
00:24:30,235 --> 00:24:31,964
The undersecretaries are all here.

267
00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:35,196
Right. Now, General Turgidson,
what's going on here?

268
00:24:36,775 --> 00:24:39,243
Mr. President...

269
00:24:39,444 --> 00:24:42,971
...about 35 minutes ago...

270
00:24:43,181 --> 00:24:47,049
...General Jack Ripper,
the commanding general...

271
00:24:47,252 --> 00:24:49,550
...of Burpelson Air Force Base...

272
00:24:49,754 --> 00:24:52,882
...issued an order to the 34 B-52s
of his wing...

273
00:24:53,091 --> 00:24:55,082
...which were airborne at the time...

274
00:24:55,293 --> 00:24:59,286
...as part of a special exercise we were
holding called Operation Dropkick.

275
00:24:59,564 --> 00:25:04,126
Now, it appears that the order
called for the planes...

276
00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:07,567
...to attack their targets
inside Russia.

277
00:25:07,772 --> 00:25:11,868
The planes are fully armed
with nuclear weapons...

278
00:25:12,077 --> 00:25:15,444
...with an average load
of 40 megatons each.

279
00:25:15,647 --> 00:25:20,084
Now, the central display of Russia will
indicate the position of the planes.

280
00:25:21,419 --> 00:25:24,718
The triangles
are their primary targets.

281
00:25:24,923 --> 00:25:28,689
The squares
are their secondary targets.

282
00:25:28,894 --> 00:25:34,161
The aircraft will begin penetrating
Russian radar cover within 25 minutes.

283
00:25:36,234 --> 00:25:39,601
General Turgidson, I find this
very difficult to understand.

284
00:25:39,804 --> 00:25:42,432
I was under the impression
I was the only one in authority...

285
00:25:42,641 --> 00:25:45,007
...to order the use of
nuclear weapons.

286
00:25:46,177 --> 00:25:50,170
That's right, sir. You are
the only person authorized to do so.

287
00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:54,546
And although I hate to judge
before all the facts are in...

288
00:25:54,753 --> 00:25:58,245
...it's beginning to look like
General Ripper exceeded his authority.

289
00:25:58,456 --> 00:26:03,189
It certainly does. Far beyond the point
I would have imagined possible.

290
00:26:03,395 --> 00:26:06,887
Well, perhaps you're forgetting
the provisions of Plan R, sir.

291
00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:08,866
Plan R?

292
00:26:10,302 --> 00:26:13,669
Plan R is an emergency war plan...

293
00:26:13,872 --> 00:26:16,363
...in which a lower-echelon
commander may order...

294
00:26:16,575 --> 00:26:19,567
...nuclear retaliation
after a sneak attack...

295
00:26:19,778 --> 00:26:23,145
...if the normal chain of command
has been disrupted.

296
00:26:23,348 --> 00:26:26,181
You approved it, sir.
You must remember.

297
00:26:27,752 --> 00:26:30,846
Surely you must recall, sir,
when Senator Beaufort...

298
00:26:31,056 --> 00:26:34,514
...made that big hassle about
our deterrent lacking credibility.

299
00:26:34,726 --> 00:26:39,322
The idea was for Plan R to be
a sort of retaliatory safeguard.

300
00:26:39,531 --> 00:26:41,396
A safeguard?

301
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:44,728
I admit the human element
seems to have failed us here.

302
00:26:44,936 --> 00:26:48,201
But the idea was to discourage
the Russkies from any hope...

303
00:26:48,406 --> 00:26:52,866
...they could knock out Washington,
and yourself, as part of a sneak attack...

304
00:26:53,078 --> 00:26:57,139
...and escape retaliation because of
lack of proper command and control.

305
00:26:57,349 --> 00:26:59,909
I assume the planes will return
automatically...

306
00:27:00,118 --> 00:27:02,814
...once they reach their
fail-safe points.

307
00:27:03,054 --> 00:27:07,650
No, sir, I'm afraid not. The planes
were holding at their fail-safe points...

308
00:27:07,859 --> 00:27:09,417
...when the go code was issued.

309
00:27:09,628 --> 00:27:13,724
Once they fly beyond fail-safe, they do
not require a second order to proceed.

310
00:27:13,932 --> 00:27:16,332
They will continue
until they reach their target.

311
00:27:16,534 --> 00:27:20,561
Then why haven't you radioed the
planes, countermanding the go code?

312
00:27:20,905 --> 00:27:24,170
I'm afraid we're unable to
communicate with any of the aircraft.

313
00:27:24,376 --> 00:27:25,866
Why?

314
00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,909
As you may recall, sir...

315
00:27:29,114 --> 00:27:32,606
...one of the provisions
of Plan R provides...

316
00:27:32,817 --> 00:27:37,277
...that once the go code
is received...

317
00:27:37,489 --> 00:27:40,686
...the normal SSB radios
in the aircraft...

318
00:27:40,892 --> 00:27:43,224
...are switched into
a special coded device...

319
00:27:43,428 --> 00:27:46,363
...which I believe is designated
as CRM 114.

320
00:27:46,564 --> 00:27:50,864
Now, in order to prevent the enemy
from issuing fake or confusing orders...

321
00:27:51,069 --> 00:27:54,869
...CRM 114 is designed
not to receive at all...

322
00:27:55,073 --> 00:27:57,234
...unless the message is proceeded...

323
00:27:57,442 --> 00:28:00,468
...by the correct three-letter
code group prefix.

324
00:28:00,679 --> 00:28:05,878
Do you mean to tell me, general, you
will be unable to recall the aircraft?

325
00:28:06,084 --> 00:28:08,917
That's the size of it.
However, we are plowing through...

326
00:28:09,120 --> 00:28:11,884
...every possible three-letter
combination of the code.

327
00:28:12,090 --> 00:28:17,153
But since there are
17,000 permutations...

328
00:28:17,362 --> 00:28:20,820
...it's going to take us about two days
to transmit them all.

329
00:28:21,032 --> 00:28:23,626
How soon will planes penetrate
Russian radar cover?

330
00:28:23,835 --> 00:28:27,236
- Eighteen minutes from now.
- Are you in contact with Ripper?

331
00:28:27,439 --> 00:28:32,172
No, sir. General Ripper sealed off
the base and cut off communications.

332
00:28:32,377 --> 00:28:35,471
- Where did you get this information?
- General Ripper called...

333
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:40,174
...Strategic Air Command headquarters
shortly after he issued the go code.

334
00:28:40,385 --> 00:28:43,718
I have a portion of the transcript,
if you'd like me to read it.

335
00:28:43,922 --> 00:28:45,787
Read it.

336
00:28:47,625 --> 00:28:50,116
The duty officer asked
General Ripper...

337
00:28:50,328 --> 00:28:54,321
...to confirm the fact that he had
issued the go code and he said:

338
00:28:54,532 --> 00:28:58,935
"Yes, gentlemen, they are on their way
in and no one can bring them back.

339
00:28:59,337 --> 00:29:01,805
For the sake of our country
and our way of life...

340
00:29:02,006 --> 00:29:04,531
...I suggest you get the rest of SAC
in after them.

341
00:29:04,743 --> 00:29:09,544
Otherwise, we will be totally destroyed
by Red retaliation.

342
00:29:09,748 --> 00:29:14,913
My boys will give you the best kind
of start: 1400 megatons' worth.

343
00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:18,521
And you sure as hell
won't stop them now.

344
00:29:18,723 --> 00:29:21,487
So let's get going.
There's no other choice.

345
00:29:21,693 --> 00:29:26,426
God willing, we will prevail
in peace and freedom from fear...

346
00:29:26,631 --> 00:29:29,896
...and in true health
through the purity...

347
00:29:30,101 --> 00:29:33,832
...and essence of our natural...

348
00:29:34,038 --> 00:29:35,403
...fluids.

349
00:29:36,441 --> 00:29:38,409
God bless you all."

350
00:29:40,378 --> 00:29:42,107
Then he hung up.

351
00:29:43,114 --> 00:29:46,572
We're still trying to figure out
the meaning of that last phrase.

352
00:29:46,785 --> 00:29:50,983
There's nothing to figure out.
This man is obviously a psychotic.

353
00:29:51,189 --> 00:29:56,149
I'd like to hold off judgment on a thing
like that, sir, until all the facts are in.

354
00:29:56,361 --> 00:30:00,821
General Turgidson, when you
instituted the human reliability tests...

355
00:30:01,032 --> 00:30:03,296
...you assured me there was
no possibility...

356
00:30:03,501 --> 00:30:05,833
...of such a thing ever occurring.

357
00:30:06,905 --> 00:30:10,864
Well, I don't think it's quite fair
to condemn the whole program...

358
00:30:11,075 --> 00:30:13,600
...because of a single slip-up, sir.

359
00:30:13,812 --> 00:30:16,212
I wanna speak to General Ripper
on the telephone.

360
00:30:16,414 --> 00:30:17,881
I'm afraid that's impossible.

361
00:30:18,216 --> 00:30:21,777
General Turgidson, I am becoming
less and less interested...

362
00:30:21,986 --> 00:30:25,478
...in your estimates
of what is possible and impossible.

363
00:30:26,691 --> 00:30:29,023
- General Faceman.
- Yes, sir?

364
00:30:29,227 --> 00:30:31,695
Are there any Army units
stationed near Burpelson?

365
00:30:31,896 --> 00:30:33,887
I'll just check, sir.

366
00:30:38,503 --> 00:30:40,164
Hello?

367
00:30:41,773 --> 00:30:44,970
I told you never to call me here.
Don't you know where I am?

368
00:30:47,178 --> 00:30:49,976
Look, baby, I can't talk to you now.

369
00:30:50,181 --> 00:30:52,649
My president needs me.

370
00:30:52,817 --> 00:30:56,378
Of course Bucky would rather
be there with you.

371
00:30:57,488 --> 00:31:00,548
Of course it isn't only physical.

372
00:31:00,758 --> 00:31:03,090
I deeply respect you
as a human being.

373
00:31:03,294 --> 00:31:06,320
Someday I'm gonna make you
Mrs. Buck Turgidson.

374
00:31:07,532 --> 00:31:10,365
Oh, listen, you go back to sleep.

375
00:31:10,568 --> 00:31:13,401
Bucky will be back there
just as soon as he can.

376
00:31:13,605 --> 00:31:18,133
All right. Listen, sug,
don't forget to say your prayers.

377
00:31:25,183 --> 00:31:29,017
Apparently,
the 23rd Airborne Division...

378
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:31,916
...is stationed seven miles away
at Alvarado.

379
00:31:32,123 --> 00:31:36,253
General Faceman, I want them to enter
the base, locate General Ripper...

380
00:31:36,461 --> 00:31:38,691
...and put him
in immediate contact with me.

381
00:31:38,897 --> 00:31:40,387
Yes, sir.

382
00:31:40,598 --> 00:31:43,567
Mr. President, if I may advise.

383
00:31:43,768 --> 00:31:48,137
Under a condition red, it is standard
procedure that the base be sealed off...

384
00:31:48,339 --> 00:31:50,967
...and the base defended
by base security troops.

385
00:31:51,175 --> 00:31:55,475
Any force trying to enter there would
certainly encounter heavy casualties.

386
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:59,446
General Turgidson, with all due
respect for your defense team...

387
00:31:59,651 --> 00:32:02,449
...my boys can brush them aside
without too much trouble.

388
00:32:03,454 --> 00:32:08,187
Mr. President, there are one or two
points I'd like to make, if I may?

389
00:32:09,260 --> 00:32:10,659
Go ahead, general.

390
00:32:12,196 --> 00:32:16,758
One: Our hopes for recalling
the 843rd bomb wing...

391
00:32:16,968 --> 00:32:21,132
...are quickly being reduced
to a very low order of probability.

392
00:32:21,339 --> 00:32:24,069
Two: In less than 15 minutes
from now...

393
00:32:24,275 --> 00:32:27,301
...the Russkies will be making
radar contact with the planes.

394
00:32:27,512 --> 00:32:29,377
Three: When they do...

395
00:32:29,580 --> 00:32:33,414
...they will go absolutely ape and
strike back with everything they've got.

396
00:32:33,618 --> 00:32:37,054
Four: If, prior to this time...

397
00:32:37,255 --> 00:32:40,691
...we have done nothing to suppress
their retaliatory capabilities...

398
00:32:40,892 --> 00:32:43,417
...we will suffer virtual annihilation.

399
00:32:43,628 --> 00:32:45,493
Now...

400
00:32:47,231 --> 00:32:49,461
...five:

401
00:32:49,667 --> 00:32:52,135
Lf, on the other hand...

402
00:32:54,038 --> 00:32:58,873
...we immediately launched an attack
on their airfields and missile bases...

403
00:32:59,077 --> 00:33:02,410
...we'd stand a good chance of
catching them with their pants down.

404
00:33:02,613 --> 00:33:04,774
We've got a 5-to-1
missile superiority.

405
00:33:04,983 --> 00:33:07,816
We could easily assign three missiles
to every target...

406
00:33:08,019 --> 00:33:11,580
...and still have an effective reserve
force for any other contingency.

407
00:33:11,789 --> 00:33:16,726
Six: An unofficial study which
we undertook of this eventuality...

408
00:33:16,928 --> 00:33:21,729
...indicated that we would destroy
90 percent of their nuclear capabilities.

409
00:33:21,933 --> 00:33:23,924
We would therefore prevail...

410
00:33:24,135 --> 00:33:28,629
...and suffer only modest civilian
casualties from their remaining force...

411
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:31,707
...which would be badly damaged
and uncoordinated.

412
00:33:31,909 --> 00:33:35,003
General, it is the avowed policy
of our country...

413
00:33:35,213 --> 00:33:37,477
...never to strike first
with nuclear weapons.

414
00:33:37,682 --> 00:33:42,244
Well, Mr. President, I'd say Ripper
has already invalidated that policy.

415
00:33:42,453 --> 00:33:46,822
That was not an act of national policy.
There are still alternatives open to us.

416
00:33:47,859 --> 00:33:49,520
Mr. President...

417
00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:52,595
...we are rapidly approaching
a moment of truth...

418
00:33:52,797 --> 00:33:55,823
...both for ourselves
and for the life of our nation.

419
00:33:56,034 --> 00:33:58,525
Now, truth is not always
a pleasant thing.

420
00:33:58,736 --> 00:34:01,204
But it is necessary now
to make a choice.

421
00:34:01,372 --> 00:34:04,000
To choose between two
admittedly regrettable...

422
00:34:04,208 --> 00:34:07,541
...but nevertheless distinguishable,
postwar environments.

423
00:34:07,745 --> 00:34:12,409
One where 20 million people are killed.
The other, 150 million people killed.

424
00:34:12,617 --> 00:34:15,450
You're talking about mass murder,
general, not war.

425
00:34:15,653 --> 00:34:19,111
Mr. President, I'm not saying
we wouldn't get our hair mussed.

426
00:34:19,323 --> 00:34:23,817
But I do say no more than
10 to 20 million killed, tops.

427
00:34:24,028 --> 00:34:25,893
Depending on the breaks.

428
00:34:26,097 --> 00:34:29,965
I will not go down in history as the
greatest mass murderer since Hitler.

429
00:34:30,168 --> 00:34:32,534
It might be better
if you were more concerned...

430
00:34:32,737 --> 00:34:36,036
...with the American people than
with your image in history books.

431
00:34:36,240 --> 00:34:39,141
General Turgidson, I've heard
quite sufficient from you.

432
00:34:39,343 --> 00:34:41,106
Thank you very much.

433
00:34:41,813 --> 00:34:44,281
Mr. President, they have
the ambassador upstairs.

434
00:34:44,449 --> 00:34:47,941
- Oh, good. Any difficulty?
- He's having a fit about the MPs.

435
00:34:48,152 --> 00:34:50,484
That can't be helped.
Have him brought here.

436
00:34:50,688 --> 00:34:52,155
Yes, sir.

437
00:34:52,323 --> 00:34:54,723
Is that the Russian ambassador?

438
00:34:54,926 --> 00:34:56,951
Yes, it is, general.

439
00:34:59,097 --> 00:35:01,895
Am I to understand
the Russian ambassador...

440
00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:04,398
...is to be admitted entrance
to the war room?

441
00:35:04,602 --> 00:35:07,400
That is correct.
He is here on my orders.

442
00:35:10,341 --> 00:35:12,502
I don't know exactly how
to put this, sir...

443
00:35:12,710 --> 00:35:15,941
...but are you aware of what
a breach of security that would be?

444
00:35:16,147 --> 00:35:20,243
I mean, he'll see everything.
He'll see the big board.

445
00:35:21,219 --> 00:35:25,815
That is precisely the idea, general.
That is precisely the idea.

446
00:35:27,391 --> 00:35:31,259
Staines, get Premier Kissoff
on the hot line.

447
00:35:38,769 --> 00:35:42,261
Survival kit contents check.

448
00:35:42,473 --> 00:35:47,172
In them, you will find
one.45-caliber automatic...

449
00:35:47,378 --> 00:35:49,744
...two boxes of ammunition...

450
00:35:49,947 --> 00:35:53,212
<i>... four days' concentrated</i>
<i>emergency rations...</i>

451
00:35:53,684 --> 00:35:56,551
...one drug issue
containing antibiotics...

452
00:35:56,754 --> 00:36:01,020
...morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills...

453
00:36:01,492 --> 00:36:04,893
<i>... sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills...</i>

454
00:36:05,363 --> 00:36:09,800
<i>One miniature combination</i>
<i>Russian phrase book and Bible...</i>

455
00:36:10,268 --> 00:36:12,793
<i>... $ 100 in rubles...</i>

456
00:36:13,004 --> 00:36:15,097
<i>... $ 100 in gold...</i>

457
00:36:15,406 --> 00:36:17,533
<i>... nine packs of chewing gum...</i>

458
00:36:17,742 --> 00:36:19,937
...one issue of prophylactics...

459
00:36:20,144 --> 00:36:23,875
...three lipsticks,
three pair of nylon stockings.

460
00:36:24,081 --> 00:36:28,882
Shoot, a fella could have a pretty
good weekend in Vegas with that stuff.

461
00:36:34,325 --> 00:36:37,089
- You don't have any fresh fish?
- I'm afraid not, sir.

462
00:36:37,295 --> 00:36:39,354
- Your eggs are fresh?
- Oh, yes, sir.

463
00:36:39,564 --> 00:36:43,398
I will have poached eggs. And bring me
some cigars, please. Havana cigars.

464
00:36:43,601 --> 00:36:46,866
And that will be all for you, sir?
I'll see to it right away.

465
00:36:47,071 --> 00:36:50,131
Try one of these Jamaican cigars,
ambassador. They're good.

466
00:36:50,341 --> 00:36:53,674
Thank you, no. I do not support
the work of imperialist stooges.

467
00:36:53,878 --> 00:36:56,346
Oh, only Commie stooges, huh?

468
00:36:57,048 --> 00:36:58,709
Mr. President.

469
00:36:59,951 --> 00:37:03,478
You're gonna let that lousy Commie
punk vomit all over us like this?

470
00:37:03,688 --> 00:37:04,916
Mr. President?

471
00:37:05,122 --> 00:37:08,353
They haven't reached Premier Kissoff.
They don't know where he is...

472
00:37:08,559 --> 00:37:11,494
...and he won't be back
for another two hours.

473
00:37:11,796 --> 00:37:14,060
- Try B86543 Moscow.
- Yes, sir.

474
00:37:14,265 --> 00:37:16,529
You'd neve, r have found him
through his office.

475
00:37:16,734 --> 00:37:20,465
Our premier is a man of the people,
but he is also a man, if you follow.

476
00:37:20,671 --> 00:37:23,231
- Degenerate, atheistic Commie.
- What did you say?

477
00:37:23,441 --> 00:37:26,877
I said, Premier Kissoff is
a degenerate, atheistic Commie!

478
00:37:27,078 --> 00:37:29,876
- Have this ignorant fool...
- I'm sorry!

479
00:37:30,081 --> 00:37:33,949
Mr. President,
I think they're trying the number.

480
00:37:44,629 --> 00:37:47,655
Gentlemen, you can't fight in here.
This is the war room!

481
00:37:47,865 --> 00:37:50,561
What is going on here?
I demand an explanation.

482
00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:54,898
This clumsy fool tried to plant
that ridiculous camera on me.

483
00:37:55,106 --> 00:37:57,574
You bet your sweets, Mr. Commie!
Look at this.

484
00:37:57,775 --> 00:38:02,144
This lousy Commie rat was taking
pictures with this, of the big board!

485
00:38:02,413 --> 00:38:04,176
Mr. Ambassador!

486
00:38:04,582 --> 00:38:08,712
This clumsy fool attempted to plant
that ridiculous camera on me.

487
00:38:08,919 --> 00:38:11,649
That's a damn lie!
I saw him with my own eyes.

488
00:38:11,856 --> 00:38:15,917
This is outrageous. I have never heard
of such behavior in the war room.

489
00:38:16,127 --> 00:38:19,392
Mr. President, I think
they're getting him on the line.

490
00:38:46,590 --> 00:38:48,421
You gotta hand it to those Commies.

491
00:38:48,626 --> 00:38:50,093
Yeah.

492
00:38:50,294 --> 00:38:53,024
Those trucks sure look like
the real thing, don't they?

493
00:38:53,230 --> 00:38:55,027
I wonder where they got them from.

494
00:38:55,232 --> 00:38:58,429
Probably bought them
from the Army as war surplus.

495
00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:05,199
Okay, open up at 200 yards.

496
00:40:02,466 --> 00:40:06,061
Tell him where you are and that
you'll speak if I say anything untrue...

497
00:40:06,270 --> 00:40:09,433
...but please don't tell him
anything more than that.

498
00:40:10,107 --> 00:40:14,237
Alexi? Alexi, please. I beg you.

499
00:40:14,578 --> 00:40:17,069
But I don't have a phone.

500
00:40:17,281 --> 00:40:19,272
Give him your phone, Frank.

501
00:40:46,610 --> 00:40:50,944
I've done as you asked.
Be careful. I think he is drunk.

502
00:40:53,984 --> 00:40:58,353
Hello? Hello, Dimitri?

503
00:40:58,556 --> 00:41:00,251
Listen, I can't hear too well.

504
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:04,155
Do you suppose you could
turn the music down just a little?

505
00:41:04,361 --> 00:41:06,158
Oh, that's much better.

506
00:41:06,464 --> 00:41:09,024
Yeah. Yes.

507
00:41:10,334 --> 00:41:13,030
Fine. I can hear you now, Dimitri.

508
00:41:13,237 --> 00:41:16,604
Clear and plain
and coming through fine.

509
00:41:16,807 --> 00:41:21,073
I'm coming through fine too?
Good. Then...

510
00:41:21,278 --> 00:41:25,112
Well, then, as you say,
we're both coming through fine. Good.

511
00:41:25,316 --> 00:41:29,446
Well, it's good that you're fine
and I'm fine.

512
00:41:29,653 --> 00:41:32,816
I agree with you.
It's great to be fine.

513
00:41:33,757 --> 00:41:35,850
Now then, Dimitri...

514
00:41:36,060 --> 00:41:41,623
...you know how we've always talked
about the possibility...

515
00:41:41,832 --> 00:41:44,460
...of something going wrong
with the bomb.

516
00:41:45,870 --> 00:41:47,804
The bomb, Dimitri.

517
00:41:48,873 --> 00:41:51,569
The hydrogen bomb.

518
00:41:51,775 --> 00:41:54,608
Well, now, what happened is...

519
00:41:54,812 --> 00:41:58,908
...one of our base commanders,
he had a sort of...

520
00:41:59,116 --> 00:42:02,210
Well, he went a little funny
in the head.

521
00:42:02,419 --> 00:42:05,388
You know, just a little funny.

522
00:42:05,589 --> 00:42:10,049
And he went and did a silly thing.

523
00:42:10,261 --> 00:42:14,561
Well, I'll tell you what he did.
He ordered his planes...

524
00:42:16,100 --> 00:42:18,625
...to attack your country.

525
00:42:18,836 --> 00:42:21,168
Well, let me finish, Dimitri.

526
00:42:22,206 --> 00:42:24,071
Let me finish, Dimitri.

527
00:42:24,275 --> 00:42:27,335
Well, listen, how do you think
I feel about it?

528
00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:30,343
Can you imagine how I feel
about it, Dimitri?

529
00:42:31,916 --> 00:42:36,148
Why do you think I'm calling you?
Just to say hello?

530
00:42:37,254 --> 00:42:39,552
Of course I like to speak to you!

531
00:42:39,757 --> 00:42:42,157
Of course I like to say hello!

532
00:42:42,359 --> 00:42:44,418
Not now, but any time, Dimitri.

533
00:42:44,628 --> 00:42:48,530
I'm just calling up to tell you
something terrible has happened.

534
00:42:48,732 --> 00:42:51,599
Of course it's a friendly call.

535
00:42:51,802 --> 00:42:56,000
Listen, if it wasn't friendly, you
probably wouldn't have even got it.

536
00:42:58,342 --> 00:43:03,006
They will not reach their targets
for at least another hour.

537
00:43:03,213 --> 00:43:06,182
I am... I am positive, Dimitri.

538
00:43:06,383 --> 00:43:08,681
I've been all over this
with your ambassador.

539
00:43:08,886 --> 00:43:11,252
It is not a trick.

540
00:43:11,455 --> 00:43:12,786
Well, I'll tell you.

541
00:43:12,990 --> 00:43:16,687
We'd like to give your air staff
a complete rundown on the targets...

542
00:43:16,894 --> 00:43:20,022
...the flight plans and the
defensive systems of the planes.

543
00:43:20,230 --> 00:43:25,031
Yes, I mean, if we're unable
to recall the planes...

544
00:43:25,235 --> 00:43:27,829
...then I'd say that, well...

545
00:43:29,273 --> 00:43:33,539
...we're just gonna have to help you
destroy them, Dimitri.

546
00:43:33,744 --> 00:43:36,542
I know they're our boys.

547
00:43:36,747 --> 00:43:39,215
All right, listen.
Now, who should we call?

548
00:43:41,085 --> 00:43:46,182
Who should we call, Dimitri?
Sorry, you faded away there.

549
00:43:46,624 --> 00:43:50,560
The People's Central
Air Defense Headquarters.

550
00:43:50,761 --> 00:43:52,922
Where is that, Dimitri?

551
00:43:53,130 --> 00:43:55,189
In Omsk. Right.

552
00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:57,460
Yes.

553
00:43:57,668 --> 00:44:00,501
Oh, you'll call them first, will you?

554
00:44:01,872 --> 00:44:04,932
Do you happen to have
the phone number on you, Dimitri?

555
00:44:06,677 --> 00:44:09,805
What? I see.
Just ask for Omsk information.

556
00:44:11,649 --> 00:44:15,949
I'm sorry too, Dimitri.
I'm very sorry.

557
00:44:16,153 --> 00:44:19,919
All right, you're sorrier than I am.
But I am sorry as well.

558
00:44:22,259 --> 00:44:24,420
I am as sorry as you are, Dimitri.

559
00:44:24,628 --> 00:44:26,459
Don't say that you're more sorry...

560
00:44:26,664 --> 00:44:29,497
...because I'm capable of being
just as sorry as you are.

561
00:44:29,700 --> 00:44:33,033
So we're both sorry, all right?
All right.

562
00:44:34,304 --> 00:44:38,536
Yes, he's right here. Yes, he wants
to talk to you. Just a second.

563
00:44:51,689 --> 00:44:53,316
What?

564
00:45:11,175 --> 00:45:14,269
What? What is it? What?

565
00:45:14,478 --> 00:45:17,447
The fools. The mad fools.

566
00:45:18,716 --> 00:45:20,616
What's happened?

567
00:45:20,818 --> 00:45:23,343
The doomsday machine.

568
00:45:23,554 --> 00:45:26,022
The doom...? The doomsday machine?
What is that?

569
00:45:26,190 --> 00:45:31,457
A device which will destroy
all human and animal life on Earth.

570
00:45:31,662 --> 00:45:33,857
All human and animal life?

571
00:45:48,445 --> 00:45:51,005
- Mandrake?
- Yes, Jack?

572
00:45:52,149 --> 00:45:55,641
Have you ever seen a Commie
drink a glass of water?

573
00:45:55,853 --> 00:46:00,347
Well, no, I can't say I have, Jack.

574
00:46:01,592 --> 00:46:06,359
Vodka. That's what they drink,
isn't it? Never water.

575
00:46:06,563 --> 00:46:10,829
Well, I believe that's
what they drink, Jack, yes.

576
00:46:11,034 --> 00:46:14,367
On no account will a Commie
ever drink water...

577
00:46:14,571 --> 00:46:16,835
...and not without good reason.

578
00:46:17,941 --> 00:46:20,501
Oh, yes.

579
00:46:20,711 --> 00:46:26,672
I can't quite see
what you're getting at, Jack.

580
00:46:26,884 --> 00:46:30,581
Water.
That's what I'm getting at, water.

581
00:46:31,622 --> 00:46:35,058
Mandrake, water is the source
of all life.

582
00:46:36,627 --> 00:46:40,119
Seven-tenths of this Earth's surface
is water.

583
00:46:40,330 --> 00:46:42,662
Why, do you realize that...

584
00:46:43,734 --> 00:46:46,669
...70 percent of you is water?

585
00:46:46,870 --> 00:46:48,167
Good Lord.

586
00:46:48,372 --> 00:46:53,366
And as human beings,
you and I need fresh, pure water...

587
00:46:53,577 --> 00:46:57,035
...to replenish
our precious bodily fluids.

588
00:46:57,247 --> 00:46:59,909
- You beginning to understand?
- Yes.

589
00:47:03,420 --> 00:47:05,251
Mandrake...

590
00:47:07,291 --> 00:47:12,456
Mandrake, have you never wondered
why I drink only distilled water...

591
00:47:12,663 --> 00:47:16,929
...or rainwater,
and only pure grain alcohol?

592
00:47:17,134 --> 00:47:20,365
Well, it did occur to me, Jack, yes.

593
00:47:21,505 --> 00:47:26,169
Have you ever heard of a thing called
fluoridation? Fluoridation of water?

594
00:47:26,543 --> 00:47:30,274
Yes, I have heard of that, Jack, yes.
Yes.

595
00:47:30,480 --> 00:47:32,277
Well, do you know what it is?

596
00:47:32,482 --> 00:47:35,474
No. No, I don't know what it is, no.

597
00:47:35,686 --> 00:47:39,486
Do you realize that fluoridation...

598
00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:42,386
...is the most
monstrously conceived...

599
00:47:42,593 --> 00:47:45,994
...and dangerous Communist plot
we have ever had to face?

600
00:47:52,035 --> 00:47:54,526
Two can play at that game, soldier.

601
00:47:58,842 --> 00:48:01,538
That's nice shooting, soldier!

602
00:48:26,036 --> 00:48:28,004
Mandrake, come here.

603
00:48:28,405 --> 00:48:30,100
You calling me, Jack?

604
00:48:30,307 --> 00:48:32,673
Come over here
and help me with this belt.

605
00:48:35,746 --> 00:48:38,647
I haven't had
very much experience...

606
00:48:38,849 --> 00:48:41,511
...you know,
with those sort of machines, Jack...

607
00:48:41,718 --> 00:48:45,176
...l've only ever pressed a button
in my old Spitfire.

608
00:48:45,389 --> 00:48:49,291
In the name of Her Majesty and the
Continental Congress, feed me the belt.

609
00:48:49,493 --> 00:48:53,930
Jack, I'd love to come,
but what's happened, you see...

610
00:48:54,131 --> 00:48:56,861
...the string in my leg's gone.

611
00:48:57,968 --> 00:49:00,493
- The what?
- The string. I never told you...

612
00:49:00,704 --> 00:49:05,835
...but, you see, I've got a gammy leg.
Oh, dear. Gone. Shot off.

613
00:49:07,878 --> 00:49:11,507
Mandrake, come over here.
The redcoats are coming. Come on!

614
00:49:12,649 --> 00:49:16,710
When it is detonated, it will produce
enough radioactive fallout...

615
00:49:16,920 --> 00:49:18,717
...so that in 10 months...

616
00:49:18,922 --> 00:49:21,891
...the surface of the Earth
will be as dead as the moon.

617
00:49:22,092 --> 00:49:24,925
Come on, de Sadesky!
That's ridiculous!

618
00:49:25,128 --> 00:49:29,121
Our studies show even the worst fallout
is down to a safe level after two weeks.

619
00:49:29,333 --> 00:49:33,030
You've obviously never heard
of cobalt thorium G.

620
00:49:33,236 --> 00:49:34,225
No, what about it?

621
00:49:34,438 --> 00:49:38,397
Cobalt thorium G has
a radioactive half-life of 93 years.

622
00:49:38,608 --> 00:49:41,577
If you take, say, 50 H bombs
in the 100 megaton range...

623
00:49:41,778 --> 00:49:44,042
...and jacket them
with cobalt thorium G...

624
00:49:44,247 --> 00:49:48,741
...when they are exploded, they will
produce a doomsday shroud...

625
00:49:48,952 --> 00:49:51,113
...a lethal cloud of radioactivity...

626
00:49:51,321 --> 00:49:55,621
...which will encircle the Earth
for 93 years!

627
00:49:55,826 --> 00:49:59,318
What a load of Commie bull.
I mean, after all...

628
00:50:00,430 --> 00:50:02,762
I'm afraid I don't understand
something, Alexi.

629
00:50:03,333 --> 00:50:06,769
Is the premier threatening to explode it
if we carry out the attack?

630
00:50:06,970 --> 00:50:09,200
No. It is not a thing
a sane man would do.

631
00:50:09,406 --> 00:50:12,637
The doomsday machine is designed
to trigger itself automatically.

632
00:50:12,843 --> 00:50:14,674
But surely you can
disarm it somehow.

633
00:50:14,878 --> 00:50:18,678
No. It is designed to explode if
any attempt is made to un-trigger it.

634
00:50:18,882 --> 00:50:20,008
Automatically?

635
00:50:20,217 --> 00:50:22,685
It's a Commie trick!
We're wasting valuable time!

636
00:50:22,886 --> 00:50:26,049
Look at the big board!
They're getting ready to clobber us!

637
00:50:26,256 --> 00:50:30,590
But this is absolute madness.
Why should you build such a thing?

638
00:50:30,794 --> 00:50:32,386
Some of us fought against it.

639
00:50:32,596 --> 00:50:36,088
But we could not keep up with the
expense involved in the arms race...

640
00:50:36,299 --> 00:50:39,359
...the space race
and the peace race.

641
00:50:40,003 --> 00:50:44,667
At the same time, our people grumbled
for more nylons and washing machines.

642
00:50:44,875 --> 00:50:47,343
Our doomsday scheme cost us
a small fraction...

643
00:50:47,511 --> 00:50:50,537
...of what we had been spending
on defense in a single year.

644
00:50:50,747 --> 00:50:53,477
The deciding factor was
when we learned your country...

645
00:50:53,683 --> 00:50:57,119
...was working along similar lines.
We were afraid of a doomsday gap.

646
00:50:57,320 --> 00:51:00,551
This is preposterous! I've never
approved of anything like that.

647
00:51:00,757 --> 00:51:03,453
Our source was <i>The New York Times</i>.

648
00:51:04,428 --> 00:51:07,761
Dr. Strangelove, do we have anything
like that in the works?

649
00:51:07,964 --> 00:51:10,762
A moment, please, Mr. President.

650
00:51:13,170 --> 00:51:16,503
Under the authority granted me...

651
00:51:16,706 --> 00:51:20,574
...as director of weapons research
and development...

652
00:51:20,777 --> 00:51:25,009
...I commissioned last year
a study of this project...

653
00:51:25,215 --> 00:51:27,308
...by the Bland Corporation.

654
00:51:27,517 --> 00:51:30,247
Based on the findings of the report...

655
00:51:30,454 --> 00:51:35,949
...my conclusion was that this idea
was not a practical deterrent...

656
00:51:36,159 --> 00:51:40,027
...for reasons which at this moment
must be all too obvious.

657
00:51:40,230 --> 00:51:43,563
Then you mean it is possible
for them to have built such a thing?

658
00:51:47,571 --> 00:51:52,531
Mr. President, the technology required
is easily within the means...

659
00:51:52,742 --> 00:51:57,008
...of even the smallest
nuclear power.

660
00:51:57,214 --> 00:52:01,878
It requires only the will to do so.

661
00:52:02,152 --> 00:52:05,644
But how is it possible for this thing
to be triggered automatically...

662
00:52:05,856 --> 00:52:08,256
...and at the same time
impossible to un-trigger?

663
00:52:08,458 --> 00:52:12,417
Mr. President,
it is not only possible...

664
00:52:12,629 --> 00:52:14,426
...it is essential.

665
00:52:14,631 --> 00:52:18,931
That is the whole idea
of this machine, you know.

666
00:52:19,136 --> 00:52:24,199
Deterrence is the art of producing
in the mind of the enemy...

667
00:52:24,407 --> 00:52:26,875
...the fear to attack.

668
00:52:27,077 --> 00:52:31,878
And so because of the automated and
irrevocable decision-making process...

669
00:52:32,082 --> 00:52:35,848
...which rules out human meddling...

670
00:52:36,052 --> 00:52:39,886
...the doomsday machine
is terrifying.

671
00:52:40,090 --> 00:52:42,058
This is simple to understand.

672
00:52:42,259 --> 00:52:45,319
And completely credible
and convincing.

673
00:52:45,529 --> 00:52:48,498
Gee, I wish we had one of them
doomsday machines, Stainesy.

674
00:52:48,698 --> 00:52:52,896
But this is fantastic, Strangelove.
How can it be triggered automatically?

675
00:52:53,103 --> 00:52:56,766
Well, it's remarkably simple
to do that.

676
00:52:56,973 --> 00:53:00,374
When you merely wish
to bury bombs...

677
00:53:00,577 --> 00:53:02,772
...there's no limit to the size.

678
00:53:02,979 --> 00:53:09,009
After that, they are connected
to a gigantic complex of computers.

679
00:53:09,219 --> 00:53:14,987
Now, then: A specific and
clearly-defined set of circumstances...

680
00:53:15,192 --> 00:53:18,525
...under which the bombs
are to be exploded...

681
00:53:18,728 --> 00:53:22,630
...is programmed into
a tape memory bank.

682
00:53:22,832 --> 00:53:26,598
- A single role of tape can store...
- Strangelove.

683
00:53:26,803 --> 00:53:29,931
What kind of a name is that?
That ain't no Kraut name, is it?

684
00:53:30,140 --> 00:53:32,301
He changed it
when he became a citizen.

685
00:53:32,509 --> 00:53:35,069
It used to be Merkwurdichliebe.

686
00:53:35,278 --> 00:53:39,874
Well, a Kraut by any other name,
huh, Stainesy?

687
00:53:41,818 --> 00:53:46,084
- Is that the whole point of
the doomsday machine...

688
00:53:46,289 --> 00:53:49,725
...is lost if you keep it a secret.

689
00:53:49,926 --> 00:53:51,951
Why didn't you tell the world?

690
00:53:52,162 --> 00:53:56,428
It was to be announced
at the Party Congress on Monday.

691
00:53:56,633 --> 00:53:59,830
As you know,
the premier loves surprises.

692
00:54:48,418 --> 00:54:50,613
Stay with me, Mandrake.

693
00:54:55,659 --> 00:54:58,492
All right, Mandrake, now feed me.
Feed me bullets.

694
00:55:28,391 --> 00:55:33,351
Jack, don't you think we'd be better off
away from all this flying glass?

695
00:55:33,563 --> 00:55:35,554
No, we're okay here.

696
00:55:36,900 --> 00:55:40,836
Mandrake, do you realize that
in addition to fluoridating water, why...

697
00:55:41,037 --> 00:55:44,473
...there are studies underway
to fluoridate salt, flour...

698
00:55:44,674 --> 00:55:49,577
...fruit juices, soup, sugar,
milk, ice cream?

699
00:55:49,779 --> 00:55:51,246
Ice cream, Mandrake.

700
00:55:51,414 --> 00:55:53,712
- Children's ice cream.
- Good Lord.

701
00:55:53,917 --> 00:55:55,976
You know when fluoridation
first began?

702
00:55:57,420 --> 00:55:59,012
No, I don't, Jack.

703
00:55:59,222 --> 00:56:01,452
1946.

704
00:56:01,658 --> 00:56:04,286
1946, Mandrake.

705
00:56:04,794 --> 00:56:08,662
How does that coincide with your
postwar Commie conspiracy, huh?

706
00:56:08,865 --> 00:56:12,028
It's incredibly obvious, isn't it?

707
00:56:12,235 --> 00:56:17,639
A foreign substance is introduced
into our precious bodily fluids...

708
00:56:17,841 --> 00:56:20,969
...without the knowledge
of the individual.

709
00:56:21,177 --> 00:56:23,771
Certainly without any choice.

710
00:56:24,881 --> 00:56:28,146
That's the way
a hard-core Commie works.

711
00:56:29,619 --> 00:56:32,747
Jack. Listen, tell me...
Tell me, Jack.

712
00:56:32,956 --> 00:56:38,394
When did you first become...
Well, develop this theory?

713
00:56:39,529 --> 00:56:41,656
Well, I...

714
00:56:41,865 --> 00:56:45,301
I first became aware of it,
Mandrake...

715
00:56:45,502 --> 00:56:48,232
...during the physical act of love.

716
00:56:49,239 --> 00:56:53,403
Yes, a profound sense of fatigue...

717
00:56:53,610 --> 00:56:56,078
...a feeling of emptiness followed.

718
00:56:56,713 --> 00:57:00,672
Luckily, I was able to interpret
these feelings correctly.

719
00:57:01,384 --> 00:57:02,976
Loss of essence.

720
00:57:04,921 --> 00:57:08,288
I can assure you it has not recurred,
Mandrake.

721
00:57:08,491 --> 00:57:12,484
Women sense my power...

722
00:57:12,695 --> 00:57:15,323
...and they seek the life essence.

723
00:57:16,032 --> 00:57:19,263
- I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
- No.

724
00:57:19,469 --> 00:57:22,233
But I do deny them my essence.

725
00:57:22,705 --> 00:57:25,230
Yes, yes, Jack.

726
00:57:37,921 --> 00:57:40,014
Cease fire!

727
00:58:01,344 --> 00:58:02,936
My boys must have surrendered.

728
00:58:03,146 --> 00:58:05,341
Well, there it is.

729
00:58:05,548 --> 00:58:07,243
Now, Jack, listen.

730
00:58:07,450 --> 00:58:10,715
While there's still time, I beg you,
let's recall the wing and...

731
00:58:12,889 --> 00:58:16,120
Those boys were like my children,
Mandrake.

732
00:58:17,293 --> 00:58:21,024
- Now they let me down.
- No, no, Jack, not a bit of it.

733
00:58:21,231 --> 00:58:23,893
No, I'm sure they all gave it
their very best.

734
00:58:24,100 --> 00:58:26,568
I'm equally sure they all died
thinking of you...

735
00:58:26,736 --> 00:58:29,261
...every man jack of them, Jack.

736
00:58:29,873 --> 00:58:31,966
Supposing a bit of water
has gone off, eh?

737
00:58:32,175 --> 00:58:34,439
One can never be too sure
about those things.

738
00:58:34,644 --> 00:58:37,408
But you look at me.
Do I look all rancid and clotted?

739
00:58:37,614 --> 00:58:40,276
You look at me, Jack. Look.

740
00:58:40,483 --> 00:58:44,442
And I drink a lot of water, you know.
I'm what you might call a water man.

741
00:58:44,654 --> 00:58:47,885
And I can swear to you,
my boy, swear to you...

742
00:58:48,091 --> 00:58:52,790
...that there's nothing wrong with
my bodily fluids. Not a thing, Jackie.

743
00:58:52,996 --> 00:58:55,157
Mandrake, were you ever
a prisoner of war?

744
00:58:55,365 --> 00:58:58,892
Well, Jack, the time's running very...

745
00:58:59,102 --> 00:59:02,037
- What?
- Were you ever a prisoner of war?

746
00:59:02,238 --> 00:59:04,206
Yes, I was, as a matter of fact, Jack.

747
00:59:04,407 --> 00:59:07,376
Did they torture you?

748
00:59:07,577 --> 00:59:10,944
Yes, they did. I was tortured
by the Japanese, if you must know.

749
00:59:11,147 --> 00:59:13,877
- Not a pretty story.
- What happened?

750
00:59:14,083 --> 00:59:18,247
I don't know, Jack. It's difficult
to think of under these conditions.

751
00:59:18,454 --> 00:59:20,547
Well, what happened was...

752
00:59:20,757 --> 00:59:24,022
...they got me on the old
Rangoon-lnchinawa Railway.

753
00:59:24,227 --> 00:59:28,459
I was laying train lines
for the bloody Japanese puff-puffs.

754
00:59:28,665 --> 00:59:31,828
No, I mean, when they tortured you,
did you talk?

755
00:59:33,603 --> 00:59:35,503
No, I...

756
00:59:35,705 --> 00:59:39,835
Well, I don't think they wanted me
to talk, really, or say anything.

757
00:59:40,043 --> 00:59:43,012
It was their way of having
a bit of fun, the swines.

758
00:59:43,212 --> 00:59:46,704
The strange thing is they make
such bloody good cameras.

759
00:59:48,651 --> 00:59:50,676
Those clowns outside
are gonna give me...

760
00:59:50,887 --> 00:59:54,186
...a pretty good going-over
in a few minutes for the code.

761
00:59:54,557 --> 00:59:55,819
Yes...

762
00:59:57,093 --> 01:00:00,620
Yes, well, you may have...
May have quite a point there, Jack.

763
01:00:01,564 --> 01:00:04,465
I don't know how well
I could stand up under torture.

764
01:00:04,667 --> 01:00:07,795
Well, of course, the answer to that is,
boy, no one ever does.

765
01:00:08,004 --> 01:00:11,997
And my advice to you, Jack,
is to give me the code now.

766
01:00:12,208 --> 01:00:14,972
And if those devils come back
and try any rough stuff...

767
01:00:15,178 --> 01:00:18,545
...we'll fight them together,
like we did just now on the floor.

768
01:00:18,748 --> 01:00:21,911
You with your gun and me with a belt
and the ammo, feeding you.

769
01:00:22,118 --> 01:00:25,019
"Feed me," you said,
and I was feeding you, Jack.

770
01:00:25,221 --> 01:00:27,519
You know, Mandrake...

771
01:00:27,724 --> 01:00:30,887
...I happen to believe in a life
after this one...

772
01:00:32,428 --> 01:00:35,829
...and I know I'll have to answer
for what I've done.

773
01:00:37,700 --> 01:00:39,065
And I think I can.

774
01:00:39,268 --> 01:00:42,601
Yes, well, of course you can, Jack.
Of course you can. You can.

775
01:00:42,805 --> 01:00:44,898
I'm a religious man myself,
you know, Jack.

776
01:00:45,108 --> 01:00:48,805
I believe in all that sort of thing
and I'm hoping, you know, Jack...

777
01:00:49,012 --> 01:00:51,776
You've dropped your gun, Jack.
Yes... You know what...?

778
01:00:51,981 --> 01:00:55,417
No, Jack, let me take that for you.
I'll take that for you, Jack.

779
01:00:55,618 --> 01:00:59,748
You know what I'm hoping? I'm hoping
you're going to give me the code.

780
01:00:59,956 --> 01:01:03,392
And... You're going to have a wash
and brush up? What a good idea.

781
01:01:03,593 --> 01:01:06,061
Always did wonders for a man,
a wash and brush up.

782
01:01:06,262 --> 01:01:08,992
Water on the back of the neck
makes you feel marvelous.

783
01:01:09,198 --> 01:01:11,758
That's what we need,
water on the neck and the code.

784
01:01:11,968 --> 01:01:15,404
Now, supposing I play a little
guessing game with you, Jack, boy.

785
01:01:15,605 --> 01:01:18,301
I'll try and guess
what the code is...

786
01:01:35,324 --> 01:01:39,727
Copilot to navigator.
I'm ready with the fuel figures now.

787
01:01:39,929 --> 01:01:42,762
We have 109,000 total...

788
01:01:42,965 --> 01:01:45,661
<i>... 79,000 in the mains...</i>

789
01:01:45,868 --> 01:01:48,530
<i>... and 30,000 in the auxiliaries.</i>

790
01:01:48,738 --> 01:01:50,535
<i>And that works out</i>
<i>to roughly...</i>

791
01:01:50,740 --> 01:01:54,073
<i>... seven hours, 15 minutes</i>
<i>endurance from this time.</i>

792
01:01:55,311 --> 01:01:59,873
DSO to captain. I have
an unidentified radar blip.

793
01:02:01,317 --> 01:02:03,877
Distance, 60 miles.

794
01:02:05,088 --> 01:02:08,148
Approximate speed, Mach 3.

795
01:02:08,357 --> 01:02:10,757
Looks like a missile tracking us.

796
01:02:13,196 --> 01:02:17,360
Confirmed, definite missile track.
Commence evasive action right.

797
01:02:23,639 --> 01:02:26,540
Missile still closing range.

798
01:02:27,410 --> 01:02:31,278
Distance, 50 miles.
Continue evasive action.

799
01:02:31,481 --> 01:02:33,506
Lock ECM to target intercept mode.

800
01:02:33,716 --> 01:02:37,777
ECM locked to
target intercept mode.

801
01:02:37,987 --> 01:02:40,285
Missile still tracking
and closing distance.

802
01:02:40,490 --> 01:02:44,426
Range, 40 miles.
Continue evasive action.

803
01:02:47,730 --> 01:02:51,530
<i>Electronic Guidance Scrambler</i>
<i>to blue grid.</i>

804
01:02:51,734 --> 01:02:55,101
Missile still tracking steady
and closing distance.

805
01:02:55,304 --> 01:02:57,169
Range, 30 miles.

806
01:02:59,475 --> 01:03:03,673
Missile still closing true and steady.
Continue evasive action.

807
01:03:11,254 --> 01:03:13,154
Range, 20 miles.

808
01:03:13,356 --> 01:03:17,087
<i>Missile still closing distance</i>
<i>and tracking steady.</i>

809
01:03:17,293 --> 01:03:19,591
Attack range gate
on maximum scan.

810
01:03:19,796 --> 01:03:22,094
Range gate on maximum scan.

811
01:03:22,298 --> 01:03:25,028
Range, 10 miles.

812
01:03:25,234 --> 01:03:29,068
Missile track deflecting.
Continue evasive action.

813
01:03:29,272 --> 01:03:32,400
Deflection increasing.
Range, eight miles.

814
01:03:32,608 --> 01:03:36,408
Deflection still increasing.
Range, six miles.

815
01:03:36,612 --> 01:03:39,240
Missile still deflecting.
Range, four miles.

816
01:03:45,087 --> 01:03:48,181
Range, two miles.
Missile still deflecting.

817
01:03:48,391 --> 01:03:50,586
Range, one mile.
Missile detonated!

818
01:03:57,300 --> 01:03:59,359
- Start lever to cutoff!
- Cutoff!

819
01:04:02,805 --> 01:04:04,204
Essential power!

820
01:04:12,682 --> 01:04:14,912
Re-select essential power!

821
01:04:15,117 --> 01:04:17,085
Essential power re-selected.

822
01:04:24,260 --> 01:04:25,625
The hatch is stuck!

823
01:04:29,232 --> 01:04:31,166
- Hit emergency power!
- Roger!

824
01:04:33,169 --> 01:04:35,967
- Extinguishers!
<i>- Roger!</i>

825
01:04:42,745 --> 01:04:45,908
- Transfer switches!
<i>- Transferred!</i>

826
01:04:46,115 --> 01:04:48,310
- Boost pumps off!
<i>- Cut off!</i>

827
01:05:00,096 --> 01:05:02,064
Fuel valves three, four and six!

828
01:05:14,644 --> 01:05:17,135
- Give me full power!
- Roger.

829
01:05:29,425 --> 01:05:33,054
"Peace on Earth. Peace on Earth."

830
01:05:36,165 --> 01:05:38,759
P-O-E.

831
01:05:38,968 --> 01:05:41,698
"Purity of Essence."

832
01:05:41,904 --> 01:05:45,362
O-P-O-E.

833
01:05:45,574 --> 01:05:46,541
O-P-E.

834
01:05:56,552 --> 01:05:58,076
Put your hands over your head.

835
01:05:58,287 --> 01:06:01,484
What the devil do you think
you're doing? Who are you?

836
01:06:01,691 --> 01:06:03,420
Put your hands over your head.

837
01:06:04,393 --> 01:06:07,089
What kind of suit
do you call that, fella?

838
01:06:07,296 --> 01:06:09,161
What do you mean, suit?

839
01:06:09,365 --> 01:06:11,663
This happens to be
an RAF uniform, sir.

840
01:06:11,867 --> 01:06:13,960
And I am Group Captain
Lionel Mandrake...

841
01:06:14,170 --> 01:06:16,070
...General Ripper's executive officer.

842
01:06:16,272 --> 01:06:17,671
Where's General Ripper?

843
01:06:18,374 --> 01:06:20,569
He's dead, in the bathroom.

844
01:06:21,344 --> 01:06:24,370
- Where's the bathroom?
- Next to you.

845
01:06:33,756 --> 01:06:36,281
I don't know what stupid game
you're playing...

846
01:06:36,492 --> 01:06:38,858
...but I've got an idea
what the recall code is.

847
01:06:39,061 --> 01:06:41,291
I have to get in touch
with SAC headquarters.

848
01:06:41,497 --> 01:06:45,092
I said, put your hands over your head
and keep them there. Go on.

849
01:06:45,301 --> 01:06:46,859
- Got any witnesses?
- Witnesses?

850
01:06:47,069 --> 01:06:49,230
What are you talking about?
He shot himself!

851
01:06:49,438 --> 01:06:51,531
While he was shaving, huh?

852
01:06:51,741 --> 01:06:56,735
Now, look, Colonel "Bat" Guano,
if that really is your name...

853
01:06:56,946 --> 01:07:00,677
...may I tell you that I have
a very, very good idea...

854
01:07:00,883 --> 01:07:03,784
...I think, I hope, I pray,
what the recall code is.

855
01:07:03,986 --> 01:07:05,715
It's some theme he kept repeating.

856
01:07:05,921 --> 01:07:09,880
A variation on "Peace on Earth"
or "Purity of Essence," one of those.

857
01:07:10,092 --> 01:07:13,789
Put your hands up on top of
your head. Start walking.

858
01:07:14,296 --> 01:07:17,094
Don't you know that General Ripper
went mad...

859
01:07:17,299 --> 01:07:20,564
...and sent the whole wing
to attack the Soviets?

860
01:07:20,770 --> 01:07:24,171
- What are you talking about?
- I'll tell you what I'm talking about.

861
01:07:24,373 --> 01:07:28,332
I'm gonna pick up this red telephone,
which is connected to SAC...

862
01:07:28,544 --> 01:07:30,375
...and I hope...

863
01:07:31,480 --> 01:07:33,539
Blast. Blast.

864
01:07:33,749 --> 01:07:38,413
Shot away, I expect, by one of your
men during this ridiculous fighting!

865
01:07:39,155 --> 01:07:41,089
Right.

866
01:07:41,290 --> 01:07:44,555
All right, Charlie, I've been
wasting too much time on you.

867
01:07:44,760 --> 01:07:48,423
I got a lot of wounded men outside.
Start walking.

868
01:08:10,820 --> 01:08:14,449
All the radio gear is out,
including the CRM 114.

869
01:08:14,657 --> 01:08:17,785
I think the auto-destruct mechanism
got hit and blew itself up.

870
01:08:22,398 --> 01:08:25,526
The fire is out.
The emergency power is on.

871
01:08:25,734 --> 01:08:29,101
Everything seems to
check out all right. Will advise.

872
01:08:29,305 --> 01:08:30,897
Roger. Navigator?

873
01:08:31,107 --> 01:08:36,204
I've worked out our rate of fuel loss
at approximately 162 per minute.

874
01:08:36,412 --> 01:08:39,313
This gives us a radius of action
sufficient to take out...

875
01:08:39,515 --> 01:08:42,712
<i>... primary and secondary targets,</i>
<i>but we will not...</i>

876
01:08:42,918 --> 01:08:47,582
...repeat, not be able to make it back
to any base or neutral country.

877
01:08:47,790 --> 01:08:53,285
<i>However, we would have enough fuel</i>
<i>to ditch at weather ship Tango Delta...</i>

878
01:08:53,496 --> 01:08:56,693
<i>... grid coordinates 003691.</i>

879
01:09:01,537 --> 01:09:03,835
Well, boys,
we got three engines out...

880
01:09:04,039 --> 01:09:07,497
...we got more holes in us
than a horse trader's mule...

881
01:09:07,710 --> 01:09:09,871
...the radio is gone
and we're leaking fuel.

882
01:09:10,079 --> 01:09:13,344
If we was flying any lower,
we'd need sleigh bells on this thing.

883
01:09:13,549 --> 01:09:16,382
But we got one little budge
on them Russkies.

884
01:09:16,585 --> 01:09:18,485
At this height,
they might harpoon us...

885
01:09:18,687 --> 01:09:21,554
...but they sure ain't gonna spot us
on no radar screen.

886
01:09:32,835 --> 01:09:34,666
The other way.

887
01:09:34,870 --> 01:09:37,202
- Where are you taking me?
- To the main gate.

888
01:09:37,706 --> 01:09:39,037
Colonel!

889
01:09:39,241 --> 01:09:42,677
Colonel, I must know what you think
has been going on here.

890
01:09:42,878 --> 01:09:44,675
- You wanna know what I think?
- Yes.

891
01:09:44,880 --> 01:09:47,440
I think you're some kind
of deviated "prevert."

892
01:09:47,650 --> 01:09:50,244
I think Ripper found out
about your "preversion"...

893
01:09:50,452 --> 01:09:54,821
...and that you were organizing some
kind of mutiny of preverts. Now, move!

894
01:09:55,291 --> 01:09:58,385
I don't know anything
about any planes attacking Russia.

895
01:09:58,594 --> 01:10:02,496
I was told to get Ripper on the phone
with the president of the United States.

896
01:10:02,698 --> 01:10:07,192
Now, just one second.
You just said, "The president."

897
01:10:07,403 --> 01:10:09,496
What about the president?

898
01:10:09,705 --> 01:10:12,731
The president wants to speak
to General Ripper, doesn't he?

899
01:10:12,942 --> 01:10:15,342
Now, General Ripper is dead,
is he not?

900
01:10:15,544 --> 01:10:17,705
I am General Ripper's
executive officer...

901
01:10:17,913 --> 01:10:20,746
...so the president will want
to speak to me, won't he?

902
01:10:20,950 --> 01:10:24,545
There's a telephone box over there
and the line may be open.

903
01:10:24,753 --> 01:10:27,415
You wanna talk to
the president of the United States?

904
01:10:27,623 --> 01:10:30,353
I don't want to talk to him,
I've got to talk to him.

905
01:10:30,559 --> 01:10:34,086
And if you don't put that gun away
and stop this stupid nonsense...

906
01:10:34,296 --> 01:10:38,198
...the court of inquiry on this
will give you such a pranging...

907
01:10:38,400 --> 01:10:42,336
...you'll be lucky to end up wearing the
uniform of a bloody toilet attendant!

908
01:10:46,208 --> 01:10:48,005
Okay. Go ahead.

909
01:10:48,210 --> 01:10:51,611
Try and get the president
of the United States on the phone.

910
01:10:53,582 --> 01:10:56,983
If you try any preversions in there,
I'll blow your head off.

911
01:11:10,266 --> 01:11:12,826
Operator? This is
Group Captain Lionel Mandrake.

912
01:11:13,035 --> 01:11:15,128
I'm speaking from
Burpelson Air Force Base.

913
01:11:15,337 --> 01:11:19,103
Something urgent has come up and
I want you to place an emergency call...

914
01:11:19,308 --> 01:11:23,176
...with President Merkin Muffley
in the Pentagon, Washington, D.C.

915
01:11:23,746 --> 01:11:26,909
Burpelson 39180.

916
01:11:28,150 --> 01:11:33,110
No, I'm perfectly serious.
The president of the United States.

917
01:11:33,322 --> 01:11:36,086
Oh, I'm sorry,
I haven't got enough change.

918
01:11:36,292 --> 01:11:39,659
Could you make this
a collect call, operator?

919
01:11:51,640 --> 01:11:53,972
Just one second, operator.

920
01:11:54,176 --> 01:11:56,940
They won't accept the call.
Have you got 55 cents?

921
01:11:57,146 --> 01:12:01,276
You don't think I'd go into combat with
loose change in my pocket, do you?

922
01:12:02,718 --> 01:12:05,516
Operator, look.

923
01:12:05,721 --> 01:12:09,088
Is it possible to make this
an ordinary trunk call?

924
01:12:09,291 --> 01:12:11,919
Well, what do you call it?
You know...

925
01:12:12,127 --> 01:12:15,062
Oh, station-to-station.

926
01:12:19,201 --> 01:12:22,659
Oh, blast!
I'm still 20 cents short.

927
01:12:24,573 --> 01:12:27,906
Operator, hold on.
I shan't keep you a second.

928
01:12:28,110 --> 01:12:32,103
Colonel, that Coca-Cola machine.
I want you to shoot the lock off it.

929
01:12:32,314 --> 01:12:34,282
There may be some change in there.

930
01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:39,285
That's private property.

931
01:12:39,488 --> 01:12:42,286
Can you possibly imagine
what is gonna happen to you...

932
01:12:42,491 --> 01:12:45,119
...your frame, outlook,
way of life and everything...

933
01:12:45,327 --> 01:12:49,661
...when they learn you have obstructed
a telephone call to the president?

934
01:12:49,865 --> 01:12:51,696
Can you imagine?

935
01:12:51,900 --> 01:12:54,630
Shoot it off! Shoot with the gun!

936
01:12:54,837 --> 01:12:57,431
That's what the bullets are for,
you twit!

937
01:12:57,639 --> 01:13:00,972
Okay. I'm gonna get
your money for you.

938
01:13:01,176 --> 01:13:05,169
But if you don't get the president on
the phone, know what's gonna happen?

939
01:13:05,681 --> 01:13:09,242
You're gonna have to answer
to the Coca-Cola Company.

940
01:13:18,160 --> 01:13:18,387
<i>This is SAC</i>
<i>Communications Control.</i>

941
01:13:21,296 --> 01:13:24,561
<i>The recall code O-P-E...</i>

942
01:13:24,767 --> 01:13:31,036
<i>... is being acknowledged "roger"</i>
<i>by elements of the 843 bomb wing.</i>

943
01:13:31,740 --> 01:13:33,605
<i>These are the details:</i>

944
01:13:33,809 --> 01:13:38,246
<i>Missions 12, 22, 30 and 38...</i>

945
01:13:38,447 --> 01:13:41,883
<i>... are reported destroyed</i>
<i>by enemy action.</i>

946
01:13:42,084 --> 01:13:46,111
<i>All other missions have</i>
<i>acknowledged recall code.</i>

947
01:13:46,755 --> 01:13:50,282
<i>This is SAC Communications Control,</i>
<i>over and out.</i>

948
01:13:50,492 --> 01:13:52,255
Gentlemen, gentlemen.

949
01:13:52,461 --> 01:13:54,725
Gentlemen.

950
01:13:54,930 --> 01:13:56,727
Mr. President.

951
01:13:56,932 --> 01:13:58,900
I'm not a sentimentalist by nature...

952
01:13:59,101 --> 01:14:02,229
...but I think I know
what's in every heart in this room.

953
01:14:02,438 --> 01:14:06,135
I think we ought to all
just bow our heads...

954
01:14:06,341 --> 01:14:09,833
...and give a short prayer of thanks
for our deliverance. Lord...

955
01:14:11,113 --> 01:14:15,379
...we have heard the wings
of the Angel of Death...

956
01:14:15,584 --> 01:14:18,212
...fluttering over our heads
from the Valley of Fear.

957
01:14:18,420 --> 01:14:21,253
You have seen fit to deliver us
from the forces of evil...

958
01:14:21,457 --> 01:14:22,947
Excuse me, sir.

959
01:14:23,158 --> 01:14:26,150
Premier Kissoff's calling again
and he's hopping mad.

960
01:14:33,001 --> 01:14:36,835
<i>Fuel flow on active engines</i>
<i>and leakage has increased.</i>

961
01:14:37,039 --> 01:14:40,998
<i>Now works out at 205.</i>

962
01:14:42,110 --> 01:14:48,515
<i>Estimate remaining fuel</i>
<i>at 8790.</i>

963
01:14:51,420 --> 01:14:55,151
Roger. Confirm 205 per minute...

964
01:14:55,357 --> 01:14:59,293
<i>... and remaining fuel 8790.</i>

965
01:15:05,934 --> 01:15:09,927
No, no, Dimitri,
there must be some mistake.

966
01:15:10,138 --> 01:15:12,072
No, I'm certain of that.

967
01:15:12,274 --> 01:15:15,243
I'm perfectly certain
of that, Dimitri.

968
01:15:16,545 --> 01:15:19,207
Just a second.
You know what he says?

969
01:15:19,414 --> 01:15:21,644
He says one of the planes
hasn't turned back.

970
01:15:21,850 --> 01:15:24,580
According to information
forwarded by our air staffs...

971
01:15:24,786 --> 01:15:27,380
...it's headed for
the missile complex at Laputa.

972
01:15:31,593 --> 01:15:35,188
That's impossible, Mr. President.
I mean, look at the big board.

973
01:15:35,397 --> 01:15:38,594
Thirty-four planes, 30 recalls
acknowledged and four splashes...

974
01:15:38,800 --> 01:15:41,598
...and one of them
was targeted for Laputa.

975
01:15:44,573 --> 01:15:47,838
Dimitri, look, we've got an
acknowledgement from every plane...

976
01:15:48,043 --> 01:15:51,069
...except the four you've shot down.

977
01:15:57,786 --> 01:16:00,414
He... Hang on a second, Dimitri.

978
01:16:00,622 --> 01:16:04,149
He says their air defense now only
claims three aircraft confirmed.

979
01:16:04,359 --> 01:16:06,759
The fourth may only be damaged.

980
01:16:08,964 --> 01:16:13,230
Mr. President, I'm beginning to smell
a big, fat, Commie rat.

981
01:16:13,435 --> 01, :16:16,996
I mean, supposing Kissoff
is lying about that fourth plane...

982
01:16:17,205 --> 01:16:19,400
...just looking for an excuse
to clobber us.

983
01:16:19,608 --> 01:16:22,771
If the spaghetti hits the fan now,
we're in trouble.

984
01:16:26,114 --> 01:16:28,605
Dimitri, look,
if this report is true...

985
01:16:28,817 --> 01:16:32,309
...and the plane manages
to bomb the target...

986
01:16:32,521 --> 01:16:36,617
...is this gonna set off
the doomsday machine?

987
01:16:39,962 --> 01:16:41,896
Are you sure?

988
01:16:43,131 --> 01:16:47,591
Well, I guess you're just gonna have
to get that plane, Dimitri.

989
01:16:47,803 --> 01:16:50,738
I'm sorry they're jamming
your radar and flying so low...

990
01:16:50,939 --> 01:16:54,807
...but they're trained to do it,
you know? It's initiative.

991
01:16:56,378 --> 01:16:59,313
Look, Dimitri, you know
exactly where they're going...

992
01:16:59,514 --> 01:17:03,780
...and I'm sure your entire air defense
can stop a single plane.

993
01:17:05,020 --> 01:17:07,614
Listen, it's not gonna help
either one of us...

994
01:17:07,823 --> 01:17:10,883
...if the doomsday machine
goes off, now, is it?

995
01:17:11,960 --> 01:17:17,125
Dimitri, there's no point in you getting
hysterical at a moment like this!

996
01:17:17,332 --> 01:17:21,428
Dimitri. Keep your feet on the ground
while you're talking, Dimitri.

997
01:17:21,637 --> 01:17:23,764
I am not... I am not getting...

998
01:17:23,972 --> 01:17:28,238
No, Dimitri, I'm just worried,
that's all.

999
01:17:28,443 --> 01:17:31,378
Look, if our air staff say
its primary target is Laputa...

1000
01:17:31,580 --> 01:17:35,414
...and its secondary target is
Borchov, I mean, it's true, Dimitri.

1001
01:17:35,617 --> 01:17:36,879
You've gotta believe it!

1002
01:17:37,085 --> 01:17:40,714
Look, can l...? Dimitri, can I give
you just one word...?

1003
01:17:40,922 --> 01:17:44,119
Can I give you just one word
of advice, Dimitri?

1004
01:17:44,326 --> 01:17:45,816
Listen, Dimitri.

1005
01:17:46,028 --> 01:17:49,464
Put everything you've got into those
two sectors and you can't miss!

1006
01:17:55,971 --> 01:17:59,532
Sir, if we continue to lose fuel
at the present rate...

1007
01:17:59,741 --> 01:18:03,404
...I estimate we only have
38 minutes flying time...

1008
01:18:03,612 --> 01:18:06,274
...which will not even take us
as far as the primary.

1009
01:18:06,815 --> 01:18:10,251
Doggone it, Sweets, you told me
that you could get me to the primary!

1010
01:18:10,452 --> 01:18:14,218
I'm sorry, sir. That estimate was based
on the original loss rate factor...

1011
01:18:14,423 --> 01:18:16,050
...not at 205.

1012
01:18:16,258 --> 01:18:18,419
I don't give a hoot in hell
how you do it...

1013
01:18:18,627 --> 01:18:20,618
...just get me to the primary,
you hear?

1014
01:18:21,196 --> 01:18:24,131
I'm sorry, sir,
but those are the figures.

1015
01:18:24,332 --> 01:18:27,460
We'll be lucky to reach
weather ship at Tango Delta.

1016
01:18:27,669 --> 01:18:29,728
Well, shoot!

1017
01:18:29,938 --> 01:18:33,601
We ain't come this far just
to dump this thing in the drink.

1018
01:18:34,176 --> 01:18:36,167
What's the nearest target
of opportunity?

1019
01:18:45,087 --> 01:18:47,715
Sir, if the rate of loss
does not increase...

1020
01:18:47,923 --> 01:18:51,552
...we have a chance
to reach target 384...

1021
01:18:51,760 --> 01:18:56,459
...grid coordinate 003691...

1022
01:18:56,665 --> 01:19:00,396
...and possibly make it from there
to the Tango Delta weather ship.

1023
01:19:00,602 --> 01:19:02,593
What kind of a target
is that, anyhow?

1024
01:19:02,804 --> 01:19:06,604
Sir, that's the ICBM
complex at Kotloss.

1025
01:19:06,808 --> 01:19:12,405
All right.
Designating new target: 384.

1026
01:19:12,614 --> 01:19:15,549
<i>Give me a heading on that as soon</i>
<i>as you get it worked out.</i>

1027
01:19:27,763 --> 01:19:32,530
Well, we'll keep our fingers crossed.
Remember, we're all in this together.

1028
01:19:32,734 --> 01:19:36,135
We're right behind you,
we're with you all the way.

1029
01:19:36,638 --> 01:19:39,869
Yes. Well, we'll keep the line open.

1030
01:19:40,275 --> 01:19:41,799
All right, Dimitri.

1031
01:19:44,613 --> 01:19:48,913
General Turgidson, is there really
a chance for that plane to get through?

1032
01:19:50,652 --> 01:19:52,984
Mr. President,
if I may speak freely.

1033
01:19:53,188 --> 01:19:56,680
The Russki talks big, but frankly,
we think he's short of know-how.

1034
01:19:56,892 --> 01:20:01,226
You can't expect ignorant peons to
understand a machine like our boys.

1035
01:20:01,429 --> 01:20:03,488
And that's not meant as an insult.

1036
01:20:03,698 --> 01:20:06,258
We all know how much guts
the average Russki's got.

1037
01:20:06,468 --> 01:20:09,596
Look at all of them the Nazis
killed off, they still wouldn't quit!

1038
01:20:09,805 --> 01:20:11,602
Can't you stick to the point?

1039
01:20:11,807 --> 01:20:15,402
Well, sir, if the pilot's good,
see...

1040
01:20:15,610 --> 01:20:19,637
I mean, if he's really sharp,
he can barrel that baby in so low.

1041
01:20:19,848 --> 01:20:24,217
You ought to see it. It's a sight!
A big plane, like a '52...

1042
01:20:24,419 --> 01:20:27,354
...its jet exhaust frying chickens
in the barnyard!

1043
01:20:27,556 --> 01:20:30,548
- Yeah, but has he got a chance?
- Has he got a chance?

1044
01:20:30,759 --> 01:20:32,124
Hell, ye...

1045
01:20:57,686 --> 01:20:58,983
Navigator to captain.

1046
01:20:59,187 --> 01:21:03,590
Approaching target
at distance 10 miles.

1047
01:21:03,792 --> 01:21:06,989
Switch from green grid
to target orange.

1048
01:21:07,195 --> 01:21:10,164
Roger. Ready for final
bomb run check.

1049
01:21:10,365 --> 01:21:11,662
- Take over, Ace.
- Roger.

1050
01:21:17,038 --> 01:21:19,438
- DSO ready.
- Bombardier ready, sir.

1051
01:21:19,641 --> 01:21:21,700
Bomb fusing, master safety on.

1052
01:21:21,910 --> 01:21:24,879
Electronic, barometric,
time and impact.

1053
01:21:25,080 --> 01:21:27,275
Bomb fusing, master safeties on.

1054
01:21:27,482 --> 01:21:30,417
Electronic, barometric,
time and impact.

1055
01:21:30,619 --> 01:21:34,077
<i>Fuse for ground burst.</i>
<i>Delay factor yellow three.</i>

1056
01:21:34,289 --> 01:21:36,780
<i>Fuse for ground burst.</i>
<i>Delay factor yellow three.</i>

1057
01:21:36,992 --> 01:21:39,620
Bomb fusing circuits
one through four, test.

1058
01:21:39,828 --> 01:21:43,286
Bomb fusing circuits one
through four, test. Lights on.

1059
01:21:43,498 --> 01:21:46,296
Bomb arming test lights on,
one through four.

1060
01:21:46,501 --> 01:21:49,231
Bomb arming test lights on,
one through four.

1061
01:21:49,437 --> 01:21:51,997
<i>Engage primary trigger switch</i>
<i>override.</i>

1062
01:21:52,207 --> 01:21:55,199
<i>Primary trigger switch</i>
<i>override engaged.</i>

1063
01:21:55,410 --> 01:21:57,878
<i>Track indicators</i>
<i>to maximum deflection.</i>

1064
01:21:58,046 --> 01:22:00,344
<i>Track indicators</i>
<i>to maximum deflection.</i>

1065
01:22:00,548 --> 01:22:03,608
<i>Detonator set to zero altitude.</i>

1066
01:22:03,818 --> 01:22:06,446
Detonator set to zero altitude.

1067
01:22:06,655 --> 01:22:08,247
Release first safety.

1068
01:22:12,227 --> 01:22:14,491
First safety released.

1069
01:22:15,897 --> 01:22:19,264
- First safety.
- Release second safety.

1070
01:22:22,737 --> 01:22:24,762
Second safety released.

1071
01:22:25,840 --> 01:22:26,864
Second safety.

1072
01:22:34,516 --> 01:22:37,076
Check bomb door circuits
one through four.

1073
01:22:49,264 --> 01:22:53,758
Bomb door circuits,
negative function, lights red.

1074
01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:56,437
<i>- Switch in backup circuits.</i>
- Roger.

1075
01:22:57,839 --> 01:23:00,467
Backup circuits switched in.
Still negative function.

1076
01:23:00,709 --> 01:23:04,372
- Engage emergency power.
- Roger.

1077
01:23:04,846 --> 01:23:07,212
Emergency power on.
Still negative function.

1078
01:23:09,284 --> 01:23:11,275
Operate manual override!

1079
01:23:12,921 --> 01:23:14,411
Roger.

1080
01:23:24,032 --> 01:23:26,398
Still negative function.

1081
01:23:26,601 --> 01:23:29,229
The Teleflex drive cable
must be sheared away.

1082
01:23:29,437 --> 01:23:33,464
- Fire the explosive bolts!
- Roger.

1083
01:23:48,089 --> 01:23:51,718
Still negative, sir.
The operating circuits are dead, sir.

1084
01:23:57,165 --> 01:24:01,067
Stay on the bomb run, Ace. I'm going
down below and see what I can do.

1085
01:24:14,049 --> 01:24:15,414
Stay on the bomb run, boys.

1086
01:24:15,617 --> 01:24:19,747
I'm gonna get them doors open
if it harelips everybody on Bear Creek!

1087
01:25:13,341 --> 01:25:16,139
Target orange grid reference checks.

1088
01:25:16,344 --> 01:25:18,505
Target distance, eight miles.

1089
01:25:18,713 --> 01:25:20,613
Roger. Eight miles.

1090
01:25:20,815 --> 01:25:23,079
Telemetric guidance computer
into orange grid.

1091
01:25:23,284 --> 01:25:25,650
Telemetric guidance computer
into orange grid.

1092
01:25:34,329 --> 01:25:36,797
Target distance, seven miles.

1093
01:25:36,998 --> 01:25:40,195
Correct track indicator,
minus seven.

1094
01:25:40,401 --> 01:25:43,859
<i>Roger. Seven miles.</i>
<i>Set GPI acceleration factor.</i>

1095
01:25:44,072 --> 01:25:46,040
GPI acceleration factor set.

1096
01:25:49,477 --> 01:25:51,843
Target distance, six miles.

1097
01:25:52,046 --> 01:25:56,506
Roger. Six miles.
Pulse ident transponder active.

1098
01:25:56,718 --> 01:25:58,242
Pulse ident transponder active.

1099
01:26:05,393 --> 01:26:08,328
Target distance, five miles.

1100
01:26:08,530 --> 01:26:12,364
<i>Five miles. Homing alignment</i>
<i>factor to zero mode.</i>

1101
01:26:12,567 --> 01:26:14,535
Homing alignment factor
to zero mode.

1102
01:26:18,139 --> 01:26:20,607
Target distance, four miles.

1103
01:26:20,775 --> 01:26:22,333
Roger. Four miles.

1104
01:26:22,544 --> 01:26:25,308
Auto CDC into
manual Teleflex link.

1105
01:26:25,513 --> 01:26:28,038
Auto CDC into
manual Teleflex link.

1106
01:26:38,326 --> 01:26:40,794
<i>Target distance, three miles.</i>

1107
01:26:40,962 --> 01:26:43,328
Roger. Three miles.

1108
01:26:43,531 --> 01:26:47,126
Target in sight!
Where in hell is Major Kong?

1109
01:27:10,992 --> 01:27:12,152
What about Major Kong?

1110
01:27:40,388 --> 01:27:43,983
Mr. President, I would not
rule out the chance...

1111
01:27:44,192 --> 01:27:47,127
...to preserve a nucleus
of human specimens.

1112
01:27:47,762 --> 01:27:50,162
It would be quite easy...

1113
01:27:52,600 --> 01:27:57,594
...at the bottom of some
of our deeper mineshafts.

1114
01:27:57,805 --> 01:28:02,504
The radioactivity would never penetrate
a mine some thousands of feet deep.

1115
01:28:02,710 --> 01:28:06,840
And in a matter of weeks, sufficient
improvements in dwelling space...

1116
01:28:07,048 --> 01:28:08,845
...could easily be provided.

1117
01:28:09,050 --> 01:28:11,280
How long would you have
to stay down there?

1118
01:28:11,486 --> 01:28:14,353
Well, that's, you know...

1119
01:28:15,823 --> 01:28:18,417
Cobalt thorium G.

1120
01:28:28,703 --> 01:28:32,503
Radioactive half-life of...

1121
01:28:34,609 --> 01:28:39,308
I would think that...
Possibly 100 years.

1122
01:28:41,683 --> 01:28:45,585
You mean people could actually
stay down there for 100 years?

1123
01:28:45,787 --> 01:28:47,880
It would not be difficult,
<i>mein Führer</i>.

1124
01:28:48,089 --> 01:28:50,182
Nuclear reactors could...

1125
01:28:50,391 --> 01:28:52,621
I'm sorry, Mr. President.

1126
01:28:52,827 --> 01:28:56,490
Nuclear reactors could provide
power almost indefinitely.

1127
01:28:56,698 --> 01:28:59,394
Greenhouses could maintain
plant life.

1128
01:28:59,600 --> 01:29:02,967
Animals could be bred
and slaughtered.

1129
01:29:03,171 --> 01:29:05,071
A quick survey would have
to be made...

1130
01:29:05,273 --> 01:29:07,571
...of the available mine sites
in the country.

1131
01:29:07,809 --> 01:29:11,370
But I would guess
that a dwelling space...

1132
01:29:11,579 --> 01:29:15,174
...for several hundred thousand of
our people could easily be provided.

1133
01:29:15,383 --> 01:29:18,375
Well, I would hate
to have to decide...

1134
01:29:18,619 --> 01:29:21,349
...who stays up and who goes down.

1135
01:29:21,556 --> 01:29:25,322
Well, that would not be necessary,
Mr. President.

1136
01:29:25,526 --> 01:29:28,256
It could easily be accomplished
with a computer.

1137
01:29:28,463 --> 01:29:30,624
The computer could
be set and programmed...

1138
01:29:30,832 --> 01:29:33,767
...to accept factors
from youth, health...

1139
01:29:33,968 --> 01:29:36,994
...sexual fertility, intelligence...

1140
01:29:37,205 --> 01:29:39,571
...and a cross-section
of necessary skills.

1141
01:29:39,807 --> 01:29:41,934
Of course, it would be
absolutely vital...

1142
01:29:42,143 --> 01:29:45,977
...that our top government
and military men be included...

1143
01:29:46,180 --> 01:29:50,947
...to foster and impart the required
principles of leadership and tradition.

1144
01:29:56,858 --> 01:29:59,850
Naturally, they would breed
prodigiously.

1145
01:30:00,061 --> 01:30:03,792
There would be much time
and little to do.

1146
01:30:04,432 --> 01:30:09,267
But with the proper breeding
techniques and a ratio of, say...

1147
01:30:09,470 --> 01:30:12,098
...10 females to each male...

1148
01:30:12,306 --> 01:30:16,800
...they could then work their way back
to the present gross national product...

1149
01:30:17,011 --> 01:30:19,479
...within, say, 20 years.

1150
01:30:19,647 --> 01:30:24,277
But look here, doctor.
Wouldn't this nucleus of survivors...

1151
01:30:24,485 --> 01:30:27,750
...be so grief-stricken
and anguished that they'd...

1152
01:30:27,955 --> 01:30:31,322
...well, envy the dead
and not wanna go on living?

1153
01:30:31,526 --> 01:30:34,290
No, sir. Excuse me.

1154
01:30:43,438 --> 01:30:47,431
No, sir. When they go down into the
mine, everyone would still be alive.

1155
01:30:47,642 --> 01:30:49,610
There would be
no shocking memories...

1156
01:30:49,811 --> 01:30:54,339
...and the prevailing emotion will be
one of nostalgia for those left behind...

1157
01:30:54,549 --> 01:31:00,681
...combined with a spirit of bold
curiosity for the adventure ahead!

1158
01:31:17,405 --> 01:31:19,305
Doctor...

1159
01:31:21,542 --> 01:31:26,878
...you mentioned the ratio
of 10 women to each man.

1160
01:31:27,081 --> 01:31:30,073
Now, wouldn't that necessitate
the abandonment...

1161
01:31:30,284 --> 01:31:33,947
...of the so-called
monogamous sexual relationship?

1162
01:31:34,155 --> 01:31:37,647
I mean, as far as men
were concerned?

1163
01:31:37,859 --> 01:31:39,087
Regrettably, yes.

1164
01:31:39,293 --> 01:31:44,526
But it is, you know, a sacrifice required
for the future of the human race.

1165
01:31:44,732 --> 01:31:50,261
I hasten to add that since each man
will be required to do prodigious...

1166
01:31:51,305 --> 01:31:53,102
...service along these lines...

1167
01:31:53,307 --> 01:31:57,175
...the women will have to be selected
for their sexual characteristics...

1168
01:31:57,378 --> 01:32:01,007
...which will have to be of
a highly stimulating nature.

1169
01:32:01,215 --> 01:32:04,981
I must confess, you have an
astonishingly good idea there, doctor.

1170
01:32:06,187 --> 01:32:07,518
Thank you, sir.

1171
01:32:08,155 --> 01:32:12,524
I think we ought to look at this from
the military point of view. I mean...

1172
01:32:13,528 --> 01:32:17,396
Supposing the Russkies stashed away
some big bombs, see, and we didn't?

1173
01:32:17,598 --> 01:32:20,294
When they come out in 100 years,
they could take over!

1174
01:32:20,501 --> 01:32:22,025
I agree, Mr. President.

1175
01:32:22,236 --> 01:32:26,036
They might try a sneak attack so they
could take over our mineshaft space.

1176
01:32:26,240 --> 01:32:30,540
It'd be extremely naive of us to imagine
that these new developments...

1177
01:32:30,745 --> 01:32:33,737
...are gonna cause any change
in Soviet expansionist policy!

1178
01:32:33,948 --> 01:32:36,416
I mean, we must be
increasingly on the alert...

1179
01:32:36,584 --> 01:32:39,246
...to prevent them from taking over
mineshaft space...

1180
01:32:39,453 --> 01:32:41,353
...in order to breed more
than we do...

1181
01:32:41,556 --> 01:32:44,457
...thus knocking us out through
superior numbers when we emerge!

1182
01:32:44,659 --> 01:32:48,618
Mr. President, we must not allow
a mineshaft gap!

1183
01:32:48,829 --> 01:32:50,592
Sir!

1184
01:32:50,798 --> 01:32:53,198
I have a plan.

1185
01:32:57,004 --> 01:32:59,564
I can walk!

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